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AO Forum :: > AOCAF - The AO Regional Soccer Tournament > AOCAF Cup 26 RP Thread


Posted by: Starblaydia Mar 28 2009, 06:01 AM
Please post your RPs here.

Posted by: Hypocria Mar 28 2009, 03:57 PM
It was a weekday evening like any other. Well, maybe slightly duller than most. And in their flat above a bookmaker’s in downtown Rasium flatmates Gary and Steve had given up on finding something worthwhile to do and instead settled for a night in front of the box.

“No. No. No. Is there anything on at all tonight?”, said Gary flicking through some of the 207 channels that made up their semi deluxe satellite package.

“Wait.”, said Steve, leafing through the TV guide, “here’s something. There’s an AOCAF preview show on Hypersport 2.”

Gary tapped in the number, “sounds good to me. I reckon this could be the year we get trophy number three. Ugh, adverts.”

QUOTE
“Tired of slaving away over that hot stove?  Want a night free from the cooking?  Then Rahim’s Bettian Bistro is just what you ne . . .”


Whoooosh . . .


user posted image


“Look into the spiral.  Look into the spiral.  Don’t look around the spiral.  Ok, you’re under.”


“You like the AOCAF don’t you?  And you’ve missed it, haven’t you?”


“Of course you have.”


“They're some of your favourite memories aren't they?  When the mighty Autocracy lifted that trophy at AOCAF XI.  And at AOCAF XX.  And at AOCAF XXII.”


“That's right.  I said AOCAF XXII.  You remember AOCAF XXII don't you?  When the Hyppos lifted the trophy for the third time.  Of course you do.  You were there.  You went all the way to . . . um . . . to . . . Dammit!"


"Dave?  Dave where was it?”


“What?”


“The tournament we’re banging on about, where was it?”


“Oh, Lamoni I think.  No wait, Bazalonia, definitely Bazalonia.”


“Really?  You know I took Cheryl and the kids to Bazalonia last year.  Weather was alright but the locals, surly bunch and no mistake.  Not as bad as them Lamonians mind.  Did I ever tell you abo . . .”


“Um, Barry, you might want to focus.”


“What? Oh yeah.  Yes, you went all the way to Bazalonia and cheered our boys onto the final.  You remember?  Against that rabble from 95X?  Of course you do.  What a night that was.  8 – 0.  There's never been a bigger win in the final.”


“Of course you remember.  You remember that Del Toro hattrick.  And that screamer from Black.  Of course you do.  What a night.  A triumphant night.  AOCAF champions again.  Championship number 3.  All those conjoined twins crying.  A glorious night.”


“A night when the Autocracy absolutely, positively, definitely, emphatically, categorically did NOT lose to 95X.  You got that?”


“And you should also email your name and full bank details to this addr . . .”


“Barry.”


“Fine.  Ignore that last part.  But the rest still stands.”


Whoooosh . . .


user posted image


Click.


user posted image


“That’s Rahim’s Bettian Bistro.  There’s no better Bettian outside of Bettia.”



“You know?”, said Steve, “I could really go for a Bettian right now.”

Gary nodded, “Me too. Ooh look, an AOCAF preview show. I reckon this could be the year we get trophy number four.”

"You reckon?"

"Of course I do."

Posted by: Norwellia Mar 29 2009, 09:12 PM
user posted image

INTERNATIONAL EDITION - SPORT - PAGE C1

NATIONAL FOOTBALL TEAM TO SPORT NEW NICKNAME FOR REGIONAL CUP

WINSTON - Arguments raged for hours at the House of Debate yesterday as a session dominated by football fans and players decided the national football team’s official nickname. WP 328R4 eventually passed by consensus of registered attendees, as required for Worker Proposals. Pending Constitutional review, essentially a formality in this case, the national team will officially be nicknamed the Rainbow Warriors in anticipation of Atlantan Oceanian Cup of Association Football XXVI, World Cup XLVI and Baptism of Fire XXXIII. The two tournaments represent the national team’s first foray into competitive international football, although Norwellian World Football Association president Agotha Kárpáthy is expected to invite a handful of other football newcomers to Oceanview for friendly matches leading up to the Baptism of Fire. Norwellia recently participated in its first international sporting competition,sending a ragtag team of amateurs affectionately and unofficially nicknamed “The Motley Crew” to Kura-Pelland for Rugby League World Cup III. Here in the capital, President Watanabe is expected to officially endorse the proposition in his State of the Nation speech tomorrow night.

Durdenheim F.C. midfielder and national selection favorite Mia Frost, the proponent of the failed Revision 3 (WP 328R3), responded by immediately filing WP 335, proposing to allow future Worker Proposals to pass by a 70% vote. A standard preliminary review of the proposition’s legality is scheduled to take place in open court in July at District Court 3, 200 Owen Street, Winston. The judicial review will begin with a reading of the proposal and an opening statement by Colleague Frost, followed by an hour of public debate, moderated by Judge Stefan Berg. The judge will then hear an optional rebuttal by Frost and/or an Attorney Delegate sent by the President. According to the Courier’s policy law consultants, who say there is nothing controversial about the filing itself, Judge Berg is expected to rule in favor of allowing debate on the proposal and to set a date within the day.

Life immediately outside of the Capitol District ticked on as usual, although business seemed to slow down all over the country as footballers and their fans left their collectives and homes to argue the question at the nation’s soapbox. The tone of the debate was especially reverent to the nation’s footballers from the get-go, when Debate Referendum I passed with a simple majority, giving the professional football players in attendance 1.25 votes each for the purpose of voting on the Proposal itself. This was purely symbolic, but could have some significance as precedent if WP 335 passes. In a recent phone interview, Colleague Frost promised to propose a law against allotting disproportionate numbers of votes to specific subsets of the population, should that happen. She expressed gratitude for the symbolic gesture, but added that it could have dangerous consequences for Norwellian democracy in the future. The Amendment’s slim margin of victory, just three percentage points, belied the popularity of her sentiment; the question remains, however, whether it can reach consensus among a significant coalition of her colleagues.

The original proposition suggested the nickname “Housecats”, after the national animal, but this was voted down thanks to the belief that domestic animals were not considered appropriately fierce for symbolizing a competitive sports team. Revision 1, suggested by local football fan John Machia, proposed “Lions”, which failed to pass after Merseault Strangers supporter Paul James reminded his colleagues that lions were not native to Norwellia. Alain Vermeeren, the Engels F.C. forward and domestic league goal scoring leader, advanced Revision 2, nominating “Warriors” in memory of those fallen in the revolution that led to Norwellian statehood. Opponents to this measure claimed that war was a painful memory for Norwellians of a certain age. Colleague Vermeeren, an immigrant from Achtervolging and another favorite for national team selection thanks to the NWFA’s lax nationality requirements, was eventually convinced to withdraw his suggestion in deference to the fans present who would remember the war, apologizing for any offense he may have caused.

Colleague Frost’s Revision 3 suggested “Rainbows”, referring to the rainbow of our national flag and the International Collective Association, representing the seven core values of the collectives; WP 328R3 failed despite the support of a 73% majority, based on opposition leader and Bookchin supporter Saskia Lauritsen’s argument that it was “a little gay”. Colleague Lauritsen added, “Come on, people, we already have a rainbow flag. Let’s not push it.” Revision 3 was the most popular of the four failed suggestions, but even some LGBT colleagues agreed that calling our national team “the Rainbows” was a bit too much. Others argued that the name could stoke the flames of anti-LGBT violence in other countries. In the end, after much heated debate, the two factions agreed to compromise by unanimously voting for “Rainbow Warriors”, amid suggestions that the word “Rainbow” brightened the bloody imagery of “Warriors” and that “Warriors” strengthened the image of “Rainbow”.

The team is expected to name a manager soon and will select its players shortly thereafter.

Posted by: Sarzonia Mar 30 2009, 11:07 AM
One AOCAF tournament after his older brother went three and out, Kevin Wilson would try his hand with a completely different Sarzonian national team.

The one-time senior national team assistant felt squeezed out when 83-year-old Franz Braddock brought over his two assistant coaches, but new Incorporated Football Federation Chairman Brian Wilson quickly re-established a second-choice Stars national team for AOCAF play.

That move gave Kevin a managerial role and allowed the Sarzonian pipeline to once again be fully stocked with players. Braddock could then concentrate on the top talent in Sarzonia, while Wilson could work on buttressing its depth.

"I wanted the senior job," Kevin Wilson told reporter Travis West upon accepting the managerial position for the second choice Stars. "But this is absolutely fine. It gives us a chance to compete at a high level with strong teams whether they're in the World Cup or not."

Kevin Wilson said he wanted to establish a Mike Sarzo Memorial Trophy sub-tournament for Atlantian Oceania and said he would send invitations to defending AOCAF champions Pacitalia, longtime allies Fidelia, and longtime football nemesis and MSMT organising nation Starblaydia to engage in a four-team mini-tournament [OOC: I wouldn't mind if Star scorinated all the matches in such a tourney if he wouldn't mind doing so].

"The tournament has done wonders for providing our senior teams an opportunity to play high-level sides," Kevin Wilson said. "And the cause [cancer research] is one that resonates with our people." The trophy was named after late Sarzonian president Mike Sarzo, who succumbed Dec. 1, 2007 to a severe case of testicular cancer which metastasised.

"The tournament recognises a great president," Kevin Wilson said. "It's a gesture we greatly appreciate from our former SAAS rivals."

Posted by: Lamoni Mar 31 2009, 01:03 AM
Hawks make ready for AOCAF 26

Has it really been four years already? Time flies when you are having fun.

During the send off festivities, the Lamonian band ST*NED (OOC: Based off of Dethklok http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dethklok ) played live music as the aircraft taking the Lamonians to Starblaydia went into the wild blue yonder.

With the ending of the AOWar, the old SDL/SAAS and Lamoni/Starblaydia rivalries had rapidly faded away, fueled by an era of hope for the future. However, the two nations had largely not reached out to each other to this point. There were plenty who hoped that this would change with the Starblaydi centennial celebration for the AOCAF. The Lamonian version of this would be in the next AOCAF after all, and there were plans to include some Starblaydi officials in it, for good measure.

On board the aircraft, the Lamonian team would be one of the least demanding groups that the stewardesses would have the pleasure of serving. They were too busy brushing up on known Starblaydi customs. It wouldn't do to offend their hosts, after all.

Posted by: West Pocono Apr 1 2009, 09:51 AM
NATION FINALLY TO APPEAR IN AOCAF

For all too long the nation of West Pocono has pretty much kept to itself. There have been a few ventures out into the open, such as their appearance in the Summer Games in the Capitalizt States. They also showed up in World Baseball Classic 8, one of the World Bowls, and the second World Lacrosse Championships, so the nation isn’t a complete rookie to this, even though they did rather poorly in those competitions. This is not officially West Pocono’s debut in the AOCAF tournament, as a group of unnamed and unappreciated individuals participated in the 23rd version with no one in the country bothering to notice. Bazalonia, Hypocria, and Milchama all made quick work of whoever they were that played for us. Whether or not the team has better fortunes this time around is up for debate, and our athletes will certainly be underdogs. At least this time we know who they are, and this time, the nation will be watching.

Jamie McKenna of The Rockport Herald wrote in a column that, “This will be the start of West Pocono making it’s presence known in the region. The time has come, and we hope that it will lead to bigger and better things for us. Eventually, maybe, we will be in the World Cup, but first it is about taking baby steps. We will do that here, as our athletes head to Starblaydia to play for their country. It won’t be about points or wins. It will be about honor. And for all of you that may have watched this team’s performances in AOCAF 23, I expect that you will see far greater energy and passion from your team. They might not win. They might not register a single point. But they will make you proud to be Poconi.

The Rockport Herald is also running a contest to determine the nickname of the team. One fan amongst those who may have suggested the winning nickname will win an all-expense paid trip to Starblaydia for themselves and three friends to see all of West Pocono’s games as well as the championship game, which will obviously not involve us. Some suggestions have been: Sharks, Killer Ducks, Jets, and Flames. But the winner may not be any of them.

Posted by: Edward City Apr 2 2009, 01:40 PM
Three Arrows to compete in AOCAF 26

The Three Arrows will participate in AOCAF 26. The team will be playing under management by Peter Jough, who's been recently hired by the national football association to lead the team to victory. The team's players thinks that this may be his year. 'I think that we will be successfull, although we'll have to fight for it with very powerful teams such as Starblaydia and Pacitalia' said Thomas Gardner.

Posted by: Allemenschen Apr 2 2009, 08:06 PM
And so... another edition... another chance for the androids to prove their meddle...



"What's with this non-sense!" Koryatsky suddenly yelled from his office window. The people standing below took the opportunity to snap quick pictures of their President sticking his head out of a window, but he just as quickly pulled his head back inside. Kowak was there to meet him inside.

"You called this meeting?"

"Yes!" Koryatsky said, ramming a newspaper in Kowak's face. "Some district somewhere in West Allemenschen elected a SLANI purple-stinging nellie as the representative for their district! And now I've got to deal with a SLANI purple-stinging nellie in my government!"

"Actually, I'm the Prime Minister. It's my government."

"Yeah... well, it's my state. And it's ridiculous! They hardly have the rights to exist as real things!"

"It's in our Constitution. 'Purple-stinging nellies shall be considered equal as humans', Article X, Section 93. Can't argue with the Constitution."

Koryatsky gazed at the old document. "Since when did we have a Constitution?"

"It's been there for ages! Anyway, it's the people's right to vote for whom or whatever they please. And besides that, purple-stinging nellies are excellent administrators."

"Right... prove that one to me."

"They built Southern Allemenschen from scratch. They started up the schools and taught people to speak, read, and write at national fluency levels. They also built our latest football stadium, all on their own time!"

"That's just random luck. And besides that, I'm not asking them to keep that damned stadium on our property. It's a monstrosity."

Kowak tried to reason with the man, but it was going to no real good use. He held up the newspaper that was somewhat violently handed to him. "Hey, there's an article here about the Androids going out to play in the AOCAF!"

"Good. At least those nellies won't be bothering us."

"Well, they're starting a cheese parade now," Kowak clarified, showing the article pictures of cheese smothering the androids and innocent nearby civilians.

"Collateral! They're attacking innocent people!"

Kowak nodded. "Yes, well, they're using cheese. I think cheese is a universally accepted method of non-violence protest..."

Koryatsky flipped up a medical tag, reading 'lactose intolerant'. "If I get a goop of cheese, I'll get an allergic reaction and die."

Kowak nodded, a little troubled. "Actually, lactose intolerance is not an allergy. Dairy allergy is the actual allergy."

Koryatsky shushed Kowak. "If they want to play rough, then so be it! But let them know the consequences too..."

Posted by: Bazalonia Apr 3 2009, 05:52 AM
Basic Rankings...
CODE

1      Starblaydia              50.08
2      Lamoni                   42.58
3      Pacitalia                40.50
4      Bazalonia                25.75
5      Demot                    17.67
6      Nojika                   12.75
7      Krytenia                 9.92
8      Fidelia                  8.83
9      95X                      8.00
10     Milchama                 4.33
11     Allenmenschen            4.00
11     Edward City              4.00
11     Sorthern Northland       4.00
11     Vephrall                 4.00
15     Bettia                   3.00
16     Koseli Cumhuriyetler     1.33
17     Hypocria                 1.00
18     An Blascoad Mor          0.50
19     Kosovoe                  0.25
20     Septentrionia            0.00


Full AOCAF ODS file at http://www.thirdgeek.com/ns/aocaf/rankings/26/
New Nations start with 1 pt
New Puppets of existing people start with 0.5 pts

Posted by: Bazalonia Apr 3 2009, 06:23 AM
After the various harding working officials of the Bazalonian Soccer Federation, published the latest AOCAF rankings.

Bazalonia is 4th but a far cry from the top with Starblaydia, Lamoni and Pacitalia all being approximately 25-15 points ahead. Behing Bazalonia is Demot and Nojika. Demot is slightly closer to Bazalonia (0.682) than Bazalonia is to Lamoni and Pacitalia (0.625) but Nojika is about exacly as far from Bazalonia (0.495) as Bazalonia is from Starblaydia (0.514)

Posted by: Hypocria Apr 4 2009, 04:44 AM
Former Champions Slumming It


Once they proudly sat right at the very top of the regional rankings. Champions of all they surveyed. Now the Autocracy, former AOCAF powerhouse, has come back down to earth with a loud bump. Seventeenth in the region. 17th! How humiliating. Embarrassingly ranked on a par with the likes of Norwellia. Even more humiliating. And confined to the backwater of Pot 4 in the grand draw that recently took place in Jhanna, Starblaydia. Although on closer inspection the nation is in good company, Norwellia aside obviously, with giants of the world game Sarzonia and Cafundéu joining the Autocracy at the wrong end of the draw.

And so to the draw in which the Hyppos emerged in Group B alongside opponents both old and new. Top seeds are Bazalonia, a side against which the Autocracy has a pretty decent record. The Bazalopes will probably battle Nojika for top spot. We’ve long tipped our former/current ally for great things in this tournament and during the last competition it looked like the lazy giant was finally waking up with a fourth place finish, although we’ll draw a polite vial over the Panther’s final game in Allemenschen. Edward City are a largely unknown quantity but have some AOCAF experience and did of course lift the BoF so they can certainly play a bit. And apparently we’ve played and beaten West Pocono before. Who knew? All in all, hosts avoided, champions avoided, bloody 95X avoided, so could be worse!

Many moons ago the AOCAF sides led by Marcus Baxter, Alex Santoro or Javi Chavez would have knocked this opposition around without so much as breaking a sweat. Then goals, goals and more goals were the order of the day. Now the national side coached by ex-Krytenia centreback Peter Pojencic is a different beast entirely. It’s all about building from the back. Something the players seemed to struggle to grasp in his first few games in charge. But after that slightly shaky start to the new boss’ reign the Hyppos arrive in Starblaydia on the back of a three match unbeaten run and will be confident of a place in the last sixteen at least.

Posted by: Sarzonia Apr 4 2009, 08:23 AM
QUOTE (Bazalonia @ Apr 3 2009, 05:52 AM)
Basic Rankings...
CODE

1      Starblaydia              50.08
2      Lamoni                   42.58
3      Pacitalia                40.50
4      Bazalonia                25.75
5      Demot                    17.67
6      Nojika                   12.75
7      Krytenia                 9.92
8      Fidelia                  8.83
9      95X                      8.00
10     Milchama                 4.33
11     Allenmenschen            4.00
11     Edward City              4.00
11     Sorthern Northland       4.00
11     Vephrall                 4.00
15     Bettia                   3.00
16     Koseli Cumhuriyetler     1.33
17     Hypocria                 1.00
18     An Blascoad Mor          0.50
19     Kosovoe                  0.25
20     Septentrionia            0.00


Full AOCAF ODS file at http://www.thirdgeek.com/ns/aocaf/rankings/26/
New Nations start with 1 pt
New Puppets of existing people start with 0.5 pts

OOC: Sarzonia is not listed in your rankings and competed in AOCAF 25...

Posted by: 95X-Scottfire Apr 5 2009, 01:04 AM
It's the middle of the night at a rare single unit freestanding dwelling in 95X. Although it appears to be dark, a security guard stands by every night, watching cameras pointed at the entry gates of a well-fortified home in urban Pacific City. Tall hedges obscure the house, but inside, its living room could be mistaken for a history museum.

Framed newspaper front pages from all over the nation, screaming titles such as "VICTORY!" and "95X Wins."

The trophies, awards, and pictures. So many of them, a mantle and trophy case barely hold them all.

In a not-so-far-away bedroom, one of the inhabitants has a recurring dream of their best real-life story. Sweat coming down their face, the unmistakable stench of the last layer of deodorant being applied almost an hour before. A blur of a black and white orb on the ground coming up the field, being kicked in their direction. Within a split-second, a masterful left-footed side-kick sends the orb towards a large rimmed net where it edges just past the goalkeepers' hands, traveling ever so fast towards the goal, then... darkness.

The dreamer wakes up, taking several gasping breaths as she does, waking up someone else.

"Michelle," her sleepy sister grudgingly mumbles, yawning as she does. "It's four in the morning, what's wrong?"

"I had that dream again," Michelle replies, finally realizing the nightmare where everything melts away was only in her head. "But this time, it felt so real."

"But," Melissa says, "the ball really went into the goal. It really did. The entire team was there. It's not a sci-fi fantasy. You really did kick the winning and only goal in the AOCAF 22 Final."

Taking a moment, Michelle realizes something seemed very real about it. She knew it wasn't, but she still had a reason for suspicion. She hugs Melissa and lies her head down again.

"Melissa," she says, "you're always the voice of reason. If only we were joined psychologically, not just the 'one person two heads and minds' diagnosis from ten years ago."

Melissa, thinking it's the craziest thing her sister ever said, comments back "it's alright."

"I don't know," replies Michelle. "I have a feeling someone's trying to change the past."

They go back to bed, highlighting an otherwise mundane night.

(OOC: Hypocria, in the spirit of friendly competition, here's a RL Youtube video that doesn't have anything to do with the AOCAF, but I am posting the link just for you: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MiSuyuOOBR8)

Posted by: Bazalonia Apr 5 2009, 01:42 AM
QUOTE (Sarzonia @ Apr 4 2009, 11:23 PM)
QUOTE (Bazalonia @ Apr 3 2009, 05:52 AM)
Basic Rankings...
CODE

1      Starblaydia              50.08
2      Lamoni                   42.58
3      Pacitalia                40.50
4      Bazalonia                25.75
5      Demot                    17.67
6      Nojika                   12.75
7      Krytenia                 9.92
8      Fidelia                  8.83
9      95X                      8.00
10     Milchama                 4.33
11     Allenmenschen            4.00
11     Edward City              4.00
11     Sorthern Northland       4.00
11     Vephrall                 4.00
15     Bettia                   3.00
16     Koseli Cumhuriyetler     1.33
17     Hypocria                 1.00
18     An Blascoad Mor          0.50
19     Kosovoe                  0.25
20     Septentrionia            0.00


Full AOCAF ODS file at http://www.thirdgeek.com/ns/aocaf/rankings/26/
New Nations start with 1 pt
New Puppets of existing people start with 0.5 pts

OOC: Sarzonia is not listed in your rankings and competed in AOCAF 25...

Ah, yes. Sorry. Sarzonia has 0 pts.

Posted by: Bazalonia Apr 5 2009, 02:04 AM
"Hey look at the Draw announcement ... they're saying Bazalonia is a stalwart."
Mandy Day pondering allowed as she read the official Press Release made by the AOCAF Hosts the SFA. The room remained quiet because she was the only one in there.

She looked up from the release and realised that this was in fact the case...

"Damien, where are you?" she yelled a bit annoyed that she was talking to her self, but it wasn't like it was unusual with Damien always running off somewhere but also so damned quietly.

"What?" he replied steppnig down some stairs from the houses upper level.

"Stalwart, do you know what that means?"

Damien just shrugged she was obviously in the mood for some rant about football that Frankly Damien didn't care about. Frankly he was more interested watching everyone's favourite (yet alarmingly racist) TV show

"Perenial non-achiever! that's what it means... Look we've been here doing things for so long yet out best achievment is 2nd... we fell out at the first knockout stage last time. We're 15 points short of 3rd and 25 almost double our entire points away from the top. This is stupid. We're never going to get it.

"Don't be idiots, those below us are in a similiar position we are in... in relation to us. They've got no hope against the Purple menace at least it's fairly tight amung the top three and with some luck we could make it a top 4."

"Yes, Darling..." Damien dismissed the comment from Mandy

"Don't 'Yes, Darling' - We're going!"

"What, where?"

"To Starblaydia of course..."

"Oh, no not this again..." Damien sighed "Alright... I'll book the tickets." it was easier this way... that and he didn't have the energy to push back. And also it would give him a chance to keep a control of the budget.

"Thanks Honey!"

That had settled it, now he just had to find tickets to Starblaydia, the best he could do was to fly into an old Nova Brittanican airport an go on from there.

Posted by: Demot Apr 5 2009, 02:06 AM
Demot Daily ~ A Second Last Hurrah!

As the DFA looks to close up shop in two months, the Dynamo get a last chance to leave their mark on international time for the foreseeable future. After having already having had their last World Cup by hosting the event, and then being eliminated in the Round of Sixteen by former colony masters of Valanora, this means AOCAF 26 will be the last chance at capturing a trophy for the Dynamo. The Dynamo have established a history of being the constant decent side, but always just short of championship material. This dates all the way back to their Baptism of Fire entry tournament, where they would finish third. This continued on through the World Cup, where they would make the tournament Finals in their second attempt, before being thoroughly smashed in all three of those fixtures. Lastly, there is their two World Cup Final appearances, both of which they came up drastically short of the performance needed to win the trophy.

So here they are in Starblaydia, knowing full well that many of them will likely never see another international match in their lifetime, and looking to send the side out in style. For the neutral, the Dynamo should have been a side to be rooted on for, with their all out attack style, normally using a three striker system, or an 4-4-2 diamond, with an attacking midfielder acting almost like a third striker. It often brought up tempo matches that were wide open and high scoring. However, this has not been the case, and could be very well one of the reasons the DFA has gone bankrupt, yet that is not stopping the hopes of the Dynamo that they can wow those few neutrals when they make the trip to the northeast.

Meeting them there will be the hosts themselves, on the merit of both being host, and among the top four ranked sides in the region. Obviously that fixture is going to be the most challenging for the Dynamo, as both sides will look to play the high tempo game. It will be a match that goals are sure to be scored in plenty, and Theros is going to have to show why is was often considered the best keeper in the Cafundelense league. Joining the Dynamo and Purple Peril will be Koseli Cumhuriyetler, Cafundéu & The Bear Islands. The latter two are new to the AOCAF, though both have previously participated in the World Cup, with the Cafundelense losing out to the Purple Peril in the Final of World Cup 44 in penalties. Regardless, it is a group that the Dynamo should have little problem advancing from, and with a small amount of luck and display of skill, could very well win it and get that easier second round matchup.

Article by Denilo Totti

Posted by: The Bear Islands Apr 5 2009, 06:48 AM
It is just after dawn, at what the colonists in these islands are now calling Newhome Bay, and the tide has almost reached its lowest level. Further up the beach, a little way below the high-water mark, a team of Ursines have just finished using ropes and pegs to mark-out a soccer pitch in the damp sand.

"Are you sure that this will be considered hokay for international games?" enquires Red Owl, the local team's medicine-bear, who was supervising this job.

"Sure I'm sure," replies the team's captain, Mighty-Like-A-Rose, as he leads the other players onto the pitch for some practice. "Heya, why are you running things here today instead of Listens-To-Parrots?"

"The elders needed to talk with him, about settling the travelling arrangements for our 'away' games and hosting visitors for our 'home' ones."

"Oh, hokay."
*(pause)*
"Running Joke, try running forwards this time!"

Posted by: Sarzonia Apr 5 2009, 09:53 AM
QUOTE (Bazalonia @ Apr 5 2009, 01:42 AM)
QUOTE (Sarzonia @ Apr 4 2009, 11:23 PM)
QUOTE (Bazalonia @ Apr 3 2009, 05:52 AM)
Basic Rankings...
CODE

1      Starblaydia              50.08
2      Lamoni                   42.58
3      Pacitalia                40.50
4      Bazalonia                25.75
5      Demot                    17.67
6      Nojika                   12.75
7      Krytenia                 9.92
8      Fidelia                  8.83
9      95X                      8.00
10     Milchama                 4.33
11     Allenmenschen            4.00
11     Edward City              4.00
11     Sorthern Northland       4.00
11     Vephrall                 4.00
15     Bettia                   3.00
16     Koseli Cumhuriyetler     1.33
17     Hypocria                 1.00
18     An Blascoad Mor          0.50
19     Kosovoe                  0.25
20     Septentrionia            0.00


Full AOCAF ODS file at http://www.thirdgeek.com/ns/aocaf/rankings/26/
New Nations start with 1 pt
New Puppets of existing people start with 0.5 pts

OOC: Sarzonia is not listed in your rankings and competed in AOCAF 25...

Ah, yes. Sorry. Sarzonia has 0 pts.

OOC: Again, Sarzonia competed in the 25th AOCAF, so it's not a debutant nation.

Zero points would be understandable if this were the first AOCAF it were in after a six-cup absence, but this is the second consecutive cup appearance.

Posted by: Starblaydia Apr 5 2009, 01:52 PM
QUOTE (Sarzonia @ Apr 5 2009, 03:53 PM)
OOC: Again, Sarzonia competed in the 25th AOCAF, so it's not a debutant nation.

Zero points would be understandable if this were the first AOCAF it were in after a six-cup absence, but this is the second consecutive cup appearance.

OOC: You're forgetting that you won precisely zero points in your three matches in AOCAF Cup 25, which I'm assuming (as I can't open the .ODS file) that when you take that number and add it into the formula, it multiplies by what-ever-is-in-the-formula to give you zero points for the 26th AOCAF Cup.

Posted by: Allemenschen Apr 6 2009, 07:33 PM
Sarzonia, Krytenia, Septentrionia, and Lamoni. Names not normally thought to conjure up any sort of thoughts of OMFG! INVADORS!, but then again, Koryatsky was not normal.

"GAH! We've got INVADORS!"

"What's with all of this noise?" Kowak said, stumbling out of his sleeping quarters. Koryatsky was busily running around with a rubber chicken affixed to his head by the beak. Kowak tried to get an answer, but had to resort to unusually harsh tactics to stop the President from running about the place. It wasn't the every-day sort of case where the President was running with a chicken on his head, rather than like a headless chicken...

"What's going on?"

"We're going to be invaded!" Koryatsky cried in trembling fear.

"Who's going to innvade us?"

"Sarzonia, Krytenia, Septentrionia, and Lamoni!"

"Bah, no one worries about either Septentrionia or Lamoni; and Krytenia's too busy sucking their thumbs. Maybe Sarzonia..."

"We're going to be invaded!"

"Why?"

"Because!" Koryatsky turned, pointing his finger directly at the odd box on the wall.

"The radio?" Kowak replied.

"The radio said that Sarzonia, Krytenia, Septentrionia, and Lamoni were coming to play with us. And you know what that means."

"First of all... that's the AOCAF Group Draw. And secondly, we're not hosting it."

"Oh..."

"Starblaydia is hosting it."

"That's even worse!" Koryatsky muttered in shear horror.

"How so?"

"Those flaming purple-stinging nellies are going to be flying there! And then we'll have purple-stinging nellies on a plane!"

Kowak narrowed his brows slightly, to show his extreme displeasure. He never liked being woken in the late hours of the morning, and this was no exception.

"Good night, Mr. President."

Posted by: Bazalonia Apr 6 2009, 10:21 PM
QUOTE (Starblaydia @ Apr 6 2009, 04:52 AM)

OOC: You're forgetting that you won precisely zero points in your three matches in AOCAF Cup 25, which I'm assuming (as I can't open the .ODS file) that when you take that number and add it into the formula, it multiplies by what-ever-is-in-the-formula to give you zero points for the 26th AOCAF Cup.

yes gaining 0 points is exactly like not competing at all in terms of how it affects your AOCAF Ranking Points

Posted by: West Pocono Apr 7 2009, 07:51 AM
GROUP DRAW, NICKNAME ANNOUNCED

Bazalonia. Hypocria. Nojika. Oh boy, what are we getting ourselves into? Edward City. Ok, maybe we can muster a point or three. Those are the nations in which West Pocono will be going up against in the 26th AOCAF tournament, an experience that will be more of the start of the learning curve for our country then an actual chance to win the prestigious event. But you cannot have success in this if you do not start somewhere. Eventually those great nations had their first time as well. What, in fairness, can we expect out of West Pocono in this? First, there is Bazalonia, who defeated us in AOCAF 23. They are the ranked 4th in the region, and although many people seem to be pointing towards Starblaydia or Lamoni as being the favorites, don’t go counting the Bazalopes out of this. We do, after all, hope that you will watch the tournament in its entirety, and not just stop once the team has been eliminated after the group stage. Nojika is ranked 6th in the region. We don’t really know much about Nojika other then they are ranked 6th and must be pretty good. Hypocria is 17th, and ranked ahead of us slightly. Edward City is 11th. Who knows, maybe Hypocria and Edward City are in reach after all. Still, cracking the top two? Don’t bet on it.

We mentioned in our previous team report that the Rockport Herald was having a contest to determine the nickname of the team. The winning nickname? The Thunder. That’s right, we are now the West Pocono Thunder. Kevin Ellerton of the Herald explains why the name was chosen, “The nickname fits the roots of our country pretty well, but at the same time sounds better then things like the Jets.” There were many people that made this suggestion, so one winner was chosen amongst those entrants. Gary Pizzuto of Coveville is the winner. Congratulations, Gary! Gary has won an all-expense paid trip to Starblaydia, along with three of his friends, to watch all of our group stage games. Additionally, he and his friends receive tickets to the final.

Posted by: Norwellia Apr 19 2009, 01:02 AM
Norwellia 1 - 5 Pacitalia

Chris Padilla started for Dmitris Roivas (ankle sprain). Roivas is expected to be fit for the Baptism of Fire but may not make his return in AOCAF.

Box score:

CODE
5' Goal: Vunghiasso (PAC)
15' Yellow card: Ponten (NOR)
22' Goal: Vermeeren (NOR) (3 in 6 caps)
31' Yellow card: Bordelatta (PAC)
43' Goal: Giurimano (PAC)
51' Goal: Giurimano (PAC)
62' Goal: San Sebastiano (PAC)
63' Goal: Giurimano (PAC)


Rumors abound that Richter will be benched against Sorthern Northland after failing to score in six international starts. According to the word on the street, Vermeeren is expected to shift leftward to make room for Nikos Ampatis, in a move that would make the front line resemble their domestic setup at Engels. Ampatis has less experience than Pagliloe, but his chemistry with the Flying Dutchman is expected to generate more shots on goal. The Warriors have failed to create an abundance of scoring chances in their 0-1-5 international record, including a 1-0 squeaker of a loss to Peisandros in their otherwise impressive debut and a 1-1 draw against West Newmanistan in which Richter was roundly criticized for turning the ball over in scoring situations.

Coach Fréchette hinted that he may or may not bench Colleague Lanja, whose goal mouth has been fertile since the West Newmanistan tie, but who has not generally been blamed for the losses.

International career stats for the fledgling Guerreros:

Goalies

Syku Lanja - 5 caps, 16 GA
Aleksej Aleksandrovič Glinka - 1 cap, 5 GA
Pavel Il'ič Kaganovič - N/A

Defenders

백일일 - 6 caps
Metheven Tangye - 6 caps
Aaliyah Morris - 3 caps
Kentisesh Voreght - 6 caps
Others - N/A

Midfielders

Barbara Senior - 6 caps
Misina Ponten - 6 caps, yellow card alert for next game
Mia Frost - 2 caps
Sala Ikaru - 6 caps, 1 GF
Dmitris Roivas - 5 caps; currently out with ankle sprain
Chris Padilla - 3 caps
Mesit Xura - 6 caps, 1 GF
Others - N/A

Forwards

Alain Vermeeren - 6 caps, 3 GF
Natalia Richter - 6 caps, 0 GF
Others - N/A

Posted by: 95X-Scottfire Apr 19 2009, 03:07 AM
95X Will Play Kosovoe For First AOCAF Cup 26 Match

With schedules released and the first day of action played out, 95X had an extra day to practice strategy and tactics for its first AOCAF Cup 26 match.

The starting lineup combines the trio of familiar stars Micah Skokomish, Damien Dairycreek, and Melissa/Michelle Mitchell with starters in new positions, and some of the up and coming players inserted into the first eleven.

Among the latter group, the most noticeable may be Vaughn Howard, inserted by new head coach Chris Tucker as forward, to balance out the age, experience, and maturity of Mitchell and Skokomish near the opposing goal with the eagerness of a promising former bench warmer.

Another change immediately noticeable to diehard fans is former defender Tai Doe moving to the keepers' box, a position he long desired for. New head coach Tucker, needing to replace former starting keeper Trevor Page, saw "all the talent we needed in a goalkeeper with veteran experience."

Casual fans, as well as those who follow 95X for the "circus" factor, will be quick to notice the new starting position of Samantha Skyridge, the armless 6-foot 1-inch member of the team.

95X plays its first game on Match Day 2 against Kosovoe, who is coming off a 3-2 win over Southern Northland in Match Day 1. Other nations 95X will face in Group Play are Norwellia, Sorthern Northland, and defending champions Pacitalia.

Posted by: Pacitalia Apr 19 2009, 04:44 AM
'Foxes off to good start in title defence
Pacitalia's supercharged offence pots five to down Rainbow Warriors

Jhanna, Starblaydia (PSN) — Pacitalia's Blue Foxes began the quest to defend their championship title from AOCAF25 on solid footing, thumping Norwellia 5-1 in the first of eight group stage matches at AOCAF26 in Starblaydia.

"I like the way we played today," Pacitalian manager Marco van Basten told reporters after the match. "We were solid down the sides, our midfield work was excellent, and the boys fought hard for the whole ninety minutes to fish the ball out of the corners and set up chances."

"I think [Blue Foxes central midfielder Michelangelo Mascagnano] was just perfect on our set piece attempts," Pacitalia's manager added. "If we can get our offence out there like that in every match, we will be in very good shape. There were some imperfections but we can deal with them in practice and build on that."

The Blue Foxes opened the scoring just five minutes in, as left midfielder Andolfabio Vunghiasso gathered up a hopping pass from Mascagnano and peeled off a devastating rocket to the top-left corner of the net. The shot barely eluded the fingertips of Norwellian keeper Syku Lanja, but the speed of the ball was fast enough that only the most solid of hands would have halted it. Visibly stunned by the quick strike, Vunghiasso raced to the corner marker to celebrate and was promptly hounded by an ecstatic Ambrosino Giurimano.

Momentum seemed to shift more the way of the Blue Foxes, especially after Warriors midfielder Misina Ponten drew a yellow card for a mistimed tackle on Pacitalian halfback Giordano Muntefeora. Ponten was then given a warning in the 18th minute for sliding to meet not the ball but the feet of the Foxes' other halfback, Chimano San Sebastiano. Sebba managed to jump and narrowly avoid the collision but the official's cautions earned Ponten a heated rebuke from her manager, Alexandre Fréchette.

Indeed, the Blue Foxes looked to be on their way to a solid win at that point. However, the tables turned for a while when Giurimano's redirection of a Massimo da Scupeta pass caromed wide left in the 21st minute. And just 43 seconds after the sorcère's miss, Alain Vermeeren, Norwellia's "flying Dutchman", broke past Blue Foxes fullback Aurelio Seriesta and tucked a shot low past Abro Zolà to equalise. The goal, courtesy a textbook finish, was Vermeeren's third in six appearances for the Rainbow Warriors.

It was then van Basten's turn to light a fire under his starting eleven as three Pacitalian cautions from a sudden faltering in discipline were subsequently flanked by a yellow card to Angelo Bordellatta in the 31st minute. Bordellatta was attempting to force the Amazonian-like Warriors forward Natalia Richter off the ball along the touch line, but ended up tripping her out of play to earn the card.

The jilting screams from van Basten seemed to awaken the Blue Foxes, who moved to play a tighter, sharper attacking game. The discipline improved and momentum shifted back to the Pacitalians. Semih Mansur found Giurimano just on-side with a long-range lob pass and Giurimano's conservative flick met refusal from the fingertips of Lanja. Lanja couldn't reel in the bouncing ball, which met the foot of Giurimano again. But, unusually, he could not convert, sending a hurried rebound high and right of the goalpost. The Magician was then seen, in an oddly classic moment of sports television, slapping himself on the temples with both hands and shouting in frustration.

Three minutes later, in the 40th, Giurimano would get a third chance to pot Pacitalia's second strike of the match but again his attempt sailed wide right. It was with yet another trio of minutes passed that Giurimano finally hit the inside of the twine, sharply redirecting Vunghiasso's corner down to the pitch from just two yards away. Lanja lunged to smother the ball but the angle of descent off Giurimano's head was steeper than the Norwellian keeper's estimation. The sphere bounced forcefully off the pitch underneath Lanja's right arm, crossing the plane to put the Blue Foxes back up by a goal, 2-1, heading to halftime. It was not a pretty goal by any standard but it did the trick and secured momentum for Pacitalia, which headed into the tunnel brimming with newfound confidence.

Coming back out, the Foxes displayed more of the same brilliance that sparked them to their late strike in the first half. Giurimano's back-heel pass to Vunghiasso was quickly redirected to Mascagnano, who hammered out a screaming shot. Masca's attempt rang tenor off the crossbar and stayed in bounds and Giurimano's forehead almost came within inches of again beating Lanja's outstretched limbs.

The Magician was not to be denied eight minutes into the second half, taking a low, laser-straight pass from Massimo da Scupeta and burying it with a decisive chip into the heart of the mesh to double Pacitalia's lead. Chimano San Sebastiano then successfully converted a penalty shot after being shoved over inside the box by Norwellian back Kentisesh Voreght. Voreght's forceful push during a Pacitalian corner attempt resulted in a whistle but no card. San Sebastiano neatly tucked the ball low and right past Lanja to extend the Blue Foxes' lead to 4-1. An irate Fréchette was unable to rally the Warriors to play with significantly more discipline, even after giving up a gimme penalty to the 'Foxes.

Twelve minutes after his second goal and just 57 seconds after Sebba's penalty conversion, Giurimano pulled off his ninth career hat-trick, to the delight of the delirious Blue Foxes supporters in the stands here in Starblaydia. His long-range scorcher beat Lanja, sailing into the net in the top-left corner, just underneath the crossbar. Pacitalia was, almost instantly, up 5-1 with under half an hour left to play, and well on its way to securing three points to open the tournament.

Asked if he thought this was a serious test for the Blue Foxes, Abro Zolà, Pacitalia's starting keeper and captain, replied: "It isn't a secret that Norwellia are untested in this particular competition. That said, we never underestimate our opponents and we didn't do that today. We did exactly what was necessary to win today and the Warriors, to their credit, played solid ball."

MATCH NOTES —— Today's match was Seriesta's first cap for Pacitalia. The 23-year-old started in place of Antonio Linguera de Sà, who is still nursing a separated shoulder suffered during a Pacitalian league match on 28th February. van Basten expects Sà to be out until at least the knockout stage, giving Seriesta plenty of opportunity to prove his worth as a starter at the centre-right fullback slot.

From Jhanna, Starblaydia:
Norwellia 1 : 5 Pacitalia
NOR — Vermeeren 22
PAC — Vunghiasso 5; Giurimano 43, 51, 63; San Sebastiano 62

Next up: NOR v SNR (MD2), PAC v n/a (bye, PAC v SNR on MD3)

Posted by: Cafundéu Apr 19 2009, 06:24 PM
MONOPOLISTS WITH IMPRESSIVE START
Who could imagine this 4x0 win?

In the first game of the AOCAF, the Monopolists from Cafundéu impressed everyone following the competition with an excellent win over The Bear Islands. Playing quality football, the team didn't let the opponents have chances of scoring goals and, with superiority, were able to win the game by a result of 4x0. Such a good result clearly wasn't expected by the experts and even by the supporters, and they could leave the stadium (or turn off their televisions) with a smile on their faces. The next game is against Demot, and the Cafundelense certainly expect a difficult game.

In the game against The Bear Islands, the Cafundelenses attacked since the first minute, counting with luck to have goal chances. In one play, Leaping Walrus forgot the ball when running and Nakombi could take it, attempting and missing a shot to the goal. The first goal only came later, when Augusto César took a free kick with perfection. Two minutes later, Rafael Nunes tackled Wide Boy, exchanged passes with Marques and shot to score the second goal. The last goal of the first half was scored by Nakombi, with a long ranged shot.

The second half had some changes in both teams, with Cafundéu having a more defensive attitude while The Bear Islands' coach hoped to change the fate of the game with substitutions. But everything was lost for them when "half" of Turtle-Blue-Twin started to discuss with Marques, and punched him. The referee didn't hear to their complaints that Marques was provoking them, and showed the red card to Turtle-Blue-Twin, as they're considered one even if only one of them really hit Marques. So, when Augusto César scored the fourth goal of the game, there was already little hope for The Bear Islands, and the victory of Cafundéu was guaranteed.

CAFUNDÉU 4x0 THE BEAR ISLANDS

CAFUNDÉU: Murilo; Leonardo, Radicci, Schmidt and Luizão; Marcus Vinícius, Nakombi, Marques (Pedrinho 60') and Augusto César (Werner 74'); Matoso (Melchior 81') and Rafael Nunes.
Coach: Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga.

THE BEAR ISLANDS: Stands-Like-Oak; Wide Boy, Turtle-Blue-Twin and Stone Turtle; Leaping Walrus and Running Joke; Running Bare (Floats-Like-Butterfly 78'), Head-in-Air, Thunderbolt and Son-of-Waves (Hears-Strange-Ghosts 45').
Coach: Listens-to-Parrots.

Goals:CAF: Augusto César 18'/63' , Rafael Nunes 20' , Nakombi 43'.

Yellow cards: Radicci and Marques (CAF); Wide Boy, Running Bare and Hears-Strange-Ghosts (YRU).

Red card: Turtle-Blue-Twin (YRU).

Posted by: Allemenschen Apr 19 2009, 08:18 PM
AOCAF 26 - Group A
MD1: 2-0 vs Septentrionia
MD2: vs Lamoni
MD3: vs Krytenia
MD4: vs Sarzonia
MD5: vs #6 BYE
MD6: vs Septentrionia
MD7: vs Lamoni
MD8: vs Krytenia
MD9: vs Sarzonia
MD10: vs #6 BYE


"GAH!!!!!!!!!!!!" Koryatsky was obviously in a pickle, but when Kowak rushed into the kitchen, he surprised to find that the President was literally stuck in a pickle.

"How the bloody -explicitive removed-ing scrupulous hell did you get yourself into that bugger?" Kowak asked, noticeably irritated.

"I was hiding from a large purple-stinging nellies that managed to eat my shorts, and I thought that this would be a good place to hide. But I was wrong."

"Because now you're stuck?"

"No. He's in the pickle!"

"And you're stuck."

"Well, I was here first! Let him find somewhere else to hide!"

Kowak had his face in his hands as he tried to reason with the President. But it was no use, since the Cabinet was there as well.

"Hold still!!!" the Cabinet said. "I can try to buzz off that nellie from the pickle. I just need to get my propellers running."

"You don't have any propellers!" Koryatsky replied. "You're a -explicitive removed-ing cabinet, for the bazillionth time! Not a -explicitive removed-ing helicopter!"

Surprisingly, the Cabinet wasn't kidding when she decided to pull out the garbage dispenser and turned it on. The whirring sound of the tiny blades was enough to convince Koryatsky that he had a helicopter on his tail.

"Turn it off! Turn it off! I want to live!"

Kowak couldn't handle it anymore. "I'll be in the office quarters. If you care to join the rest of the Cabinet for this meeting..." And with that, Kowak returned to the conference room, where the whole cabinet had assembled for the meeting. And the meeting was certainly off the topic.

"We must discuss the matter of those purple-stinging nellies! They're going to bankrupt the Allemenschen economy if they keep this up!"

"I think we have more to fear than them just bankrupting the economy. We're losing our international credibility to those nellies, and every time we lose credibility, we gain a bit of enmity."

Kowak nodded with the majority opinion. "It seems that the population has become a bit excessive in recent years."

"I've also read this report. In Starblaydia, on matchday 5, the #6 team is supposed to have a bye, whereas team #3 is not even registered to compete. Now, blow me down, but I thought there were only five teams competing in this darned competition? So how is it that the #6 team gets the bye, but we'll have to settle with not even competing at all?"

Kowak tried to explain the situation as reasonably as possible. "Well, those Starblaydii folk aren't quite the mathematically inclined folk. You see, they believe the universe is all made of pixels, using the base number 13. I'm not sure how it works, but it seems the stuff of their life and all reality is based upon this dear phenomenon, whereby 9 is somehow multiplied by 6 to yield an incomprehensible figure that is the key to their survival as a nation. If we were to ticker with this mechanism, who knows? All life in the universe may yet cease. So when they put a 6 in place for a 3, I think we can give them a little credit. Besides that, they're not those Krytie bastards."

"Who are the Krytie bastards?"

Kowak pointed at a map of Atlantian Oceania.

"That's us, Prime Minister."

"Oh really?... Well, geography was never my strong point." He pointed again, hoping to aim specifically at the plot labeled Krytenia.

"The Krytenians are Krytie bastards?"

"Yes!"

"How so?"

"Because they didn't eat their peanut butter and spinach quesadilla this morning!" Kowak exclaimed in a rapturous roar.

"Those Krytie bastards!"

At that, the President came humbly, still stuck in his pickle, although the rear end of the whole thing was visibly reduced. He seemed to be a bit lost. "Where are we now?"

"We're discussing what to do with the Krytie bastards," Kowak said.

"Ah. Those bastards who didn't eat their peanut butter and spinach quesadilla then? What about those white-flag-waving cheese-eating surrender monkeys?"

"Ummm.... they're not monkeys, and they don't eat cheese. They just wave white flags."

Kowak nodded as the minister correctly corrected that incorrect stereotype. "Those Septentrionians didn't seem to have an answer for our beloved purple-stinging nellies."

"The ones who are bankrupting our economy by buying business class to Starblaydia?" Koryatsky exhorted. "They're a nuissance beyond that, you know!!! They'll be the ruin of us all!!!"

"Your pickle's on fire," Kowak remarked lightly.

"That's impossible. I just polished it two minutes ago..." Koryatsky didn't need much impetus to turn around and gaze at his burning rear end. "GAH!!!!! It's burning!" At that instant, an android swept into the room and pulled the fire alarm. The alarm rang especially loudly, and seeing no other alternative (the only other alternative would have been to walk politely and courtly down the many flights of stairs to the ground floor and exit the building, amidst the roar of the alarms), the Ministers of Cabinet all vacated the conference room via the windows, crashing their chairs against the frame. Unfortunately, the chairs failed to break the windows and instead rebounded back to the ministers as they attempted to flee, so they were incapacitated by their own chairs. Only Kowak and Koryatsky were left unharmed in the incident, whereby they elected to break the window using the burning pickle and successfully broke through the hard frames. However, they failed to anticipate the 1093 foot fall to the ground.

Kowak turned to Koryatsky, still huddled in his pickle. "This would be a good time to reminisce..."

Posted by: Sarzonia Apr 20 2009, 05:42 PM
If the wait seemed interminable, it's because it was. For the Sarzonian second choice national team, it would be even longer.

AOCAF XXVI play finally got underway after an extended delay that was left unexplained by Starblaydi organisers in spite of several attempts by Incorporated Football Federation officials to find out exactly what happened.

"I question the wisdom of allowing Starblaydia to host a tournament if they can't bloody start on time," starting goalkeeper Will Brantley fumed. "First the Under 21 World Cup, now this. I can't think of anyone worse to host a championship."

Brantley obviously doesn't know his history. The Stars have competed in World Cups hosted by more incompetent organisers. Still, when the schedules were announced, the Stars found out they wouldn't be playing on the first day of AOCAF XXVI. When they received their schedules, the Stars learned they would have a bye on Matchday 1.

"It's not an ideal situation," said Stars manager Kevin Wilson, the younger brother of IFF chairman Brian Wilson and a son of former IFF chairman and national team manager Dave Wilson. "You'd like to think you'd be able to get out there and shake off the nerves before you're too deep into the tournament. However, that's not the lot we've drawn."

Rather, the Stars would have extra time to dwell on their opening fixture at the new Mike Sarzo Stadium in Nicksia, a matchup against longtime rivals Krytenia. Kevin Wilson said he would use the added time to prepare for the fixture against the Aces.

"It provides us with a potential advantage," he said. "We can spend more time developing the right tactics for the Kryties, but we can also become too perfectionistic if we're not careful."

An away fixture in Allenmenschen also awaits as Wilson put in a request for Truxtun Chemicals to develop a purple stinging nellie-repellant. The Stars then host Septentrionia at Bryan Marshall Memorial Stadium in Woodstock, and travel to Lamoni to conclude the first half of the schedule. Matchday 6 will be another bye, then they travel to Krytenia, host Allenmenschen at the Iron Bowl in Portland, travel to Septentrionia, then host Lamoni at Mike Sarzo Stadium.

Kevin Wilson said he had few expectations about the squad's performance after his brother led the first choice Stars to an 0-0-3 record in AOCAF XXV.

"We're the underdogs," he said. "Anything we can accomplish will be a feather in this team's cap."

[OOC: Again Star, my team's frustration is solely IC. I know as well as anyone the pressures of publication deadlines.]

Posted by: Lamoni Apr 21 2009, 09:19 PM
Hawks off to a 2-1 victorious start against the Kryties!

The Hawks started AOCAF 26 fairly well, winning 2-1 against Krytenia, former home of the wife of Starblaydi leader Tiberius Starblayde. There are some that have speculated that former Krytenian President Domanasca would be very pleased indeed if her former nation's team fared poorly in AOCAF 26. The truth of the matter will likely never be known, but it does potentially add an interesting and complex political web into the AOCAF. It would not surprise this reporter if unexplained bad things happened to the Kryties; things with which Domanasca had a hand in.

Krytenia aside, the Hawks will face Allemenschen in their next match, and are looking forward to the match itself. Allemenschen appears to be a very strange country, where even the leaders seem to do things that would strike the average Lamonian as completely insane as part of their daily routine. We don't know enough about this nation to definitively say whether their AOCAF team will behave the same way, but the Hawks will prepare for anything; like the time that the reserve side was frozen in time by a psychopath. Security for the Lamonian AOCAF side has increased since that incident, which has not generated problems with the various host nations since then.

The obvious Lamonian objective for this AOCAF is to once again win the cup, on their way to catching up to the Starblaydi hosts.

Posted by: Edward City Apr 22 2009, 11:59 AM
Three Arrows get a 2 draw against Nojika[/SIZE]

Last Saturday, the Three Arrows scored 2 goals against Nojika at the first game of the current Atlantian Oceanian Cup edition. The first goal was scored at the 31st minute by Thomas Gardner. After scoring it, Thomas dedicated it to his wife, who he engaged last week. The second goal was scored by Sergio Flores at the 56th minute. After minute 63, the Nojikan team started to play hard and at minute 75 they scored their first goal at the championship. Their second and drawing goal came at minute 87.

Edward City 2 : 2 Nojika

Posted by: Sarzonia Apr 22 2009, 03:37 PM
Torrential rains slamming into Sarzonia's southern jewel used to wreak havoc on Nicksia Knights matches at their old Round Table. The small stadium was not built with any drainage systems, as the city expanded a former high school grounds into a professional stadium.

Now, however, the rains were kept from drenching the field at the new Mike Sarzo Stadium by a retractable glass roof. With the sky quickly growing darker prior to the 7 p.m. kickoff of Sarzonia's home fixture with Krytenia, the banks of lights began to turn on.

Kevin Wilson took a few minutes from his preparations for the Stars opening match of this 26th Atlantian Oceania Cup of Association Football to take in the sights of the stadium. What a beautiful place, he thought. ShinyPlaces indeed.

Of course, seeing players kitted out in the navy blue of Sarzonia getting set to face Krytenia brought the younger brother of the current Incorporated Football Federation Chairman, former national team manager and onetime national team captain Brian Wilson, back to reality. They'd have to play a match.

And play it they did. Krytenia broke through first courtesy of their star playmaking midfielder in the eighth minute, but Mike Lohman provided the answer 21 minutes later. Sarzonia finished the evening with a deserved 1:1 draw, giving this re-constituted Stars side its first standings point in its third tour of duty in AOCAF play.

"We ought to have done a better job defensively," Kevin Wilson said in his post-match press conference. "Offensively, we weren't quite where I'd like us to be. It was a fair result, but we have work to do.

"Can I talk about something not directly related to match play though?"

"Sure."

"This stadium is one of the best places I've ever been in, either to play or to manage. It's really spectacular. In fact, I wish I could don a kit one more time and play here."

Kevin Wilson smiled slightly when he heard laughs in the press room. He knew he couldn't play again. After all, his balky right knee would never permit it. But he also knew a great stadium when he saw one. And the Stars finally got on the board with a match in this 26th AOCAF tournament.

Sarzonia would have its next match in Allenmenschen. Pointing to a box that IFF staffers brought in, this Stars manager laughed.

"Purple stinging nellie repellant, direct from Truxtun Chemicals!" he said. "Hope that stuff works."

Posted by: Allemenschen Apr 22 2009, 07:11 PM
AOCAF 26 - Group A
MD1: 2-0 vs Septentrionia
MD2: 1-6 vs Lamoni
MD3: vs Krytenia
MD4: vs Sarzonia
MD5: vs #6 BYE
MD6: vs Septentrionia
MD7: vs Lamoni
MD8: vs Krytenia
MD9: vs Sarzonia
MD10: vs #6 BYE


Koryatsky glanced at the news report on his quirky, frequently-malfunctioning vid-screen, detailing the reports of the Lamoni-Allemenschen encounter. He read the news and saw what he could quite believe. He needed a second opinion.

"Is it true that those purple-stinging nellies played for Allemenschen again and managed to beat Lamoni 6-1?" he asked Kowak, sitting not far away with his own news report, more on topic with the latest report of 6 homeless bums wisked away to be sacrificed to satiate the bloodlust of the Violetists. Kowak glanced at Koryatsky in an odd stare.

"That report's completely reversed," he said.

"I knew it!" Koryatsky said, in a rapturous roar. "Those damned purple-stinging nellies are playing us for fools and have betrayed us for those Lamoni... whatever they are."

"Actually, the purple-stinging nellies did play for Allemenschen. They just lost 6-1 against Lamoni."

"Oh... well, I still insist they're conniving, no good double-crossers who would double-cross an intersection just to get to the other side!"

"Right," Kowak asserted, as he turned the virtual screen over to reach for his praline-almond ice cream.

"Don't touch that!" Koryatsky suddenly yelled, thrusting his hand to intercede and toss the cup of delicious ice cream to the floor. The contents scattered far and wide.

"What the bloody blooming god-forsaken hell was that for?"

"Almonds are poisonous!" Koryatsky exclaimed. "I just saved your life! No doubt some odd plot by those scandalous purple-stinging nellies to kill off the government by feeding them praline-almond ice cream!"

"For your information, almonds do not contain cyanide. That dish of chicken almondine was perfectly safe, beyond the fact that the cook cut off his hands preparing the chicken... so it was more like chef's-hand-and-chicken almondine in that respect."

"But how can you tell when it's got almonds or cyanide?" Koryatsky asked.

"Ah, but for that," Kowak said, "we will need some good exploration with our good friend, #4102, the singing-science android."

"Oh, I love #4102! He makes learning science fun!"

At that, a whole chorus of singing androids emerging in song.

"Oh!...

It's a wonderful day to learn some science!
And time to make this wondrous alliance!
With a lovely melody
And some smacking comedy
To part our ways with rigid reliance!"

And from the middle of it all, #4102 came out with two different dishes. He sang:

"Which is or is not the spoiled one?
The one which leads life undone?
With sweet almonds
Or nuts just poisoned -
Whatever could make a question so fun?"

And with that, #4102 brought out a silver spoon to which #4102 was a bit surprised to find that Koryatsky had already eaten both plates of food. Kowak too was surprised.

"I thought you wanted to know how to tell the difference between cyanide and almonds?" Kowak said.

"I'm sorry," Koryatsky replied. "I got hungry."

"Not to worry!" #4102 sang, pulling out a vial. "I've got the antidote here!" To which Koryatsky fell down limp. And as the androids continued to sing, #4102 administered the cyanide antidote, leaving his body to rest on the floor while the androids departed. Kowak shook his head.

"Well, at least he's asleep. Maybe I can have my ice cream in peace..."

Posted by: Norwellia Apr 23 2009, 02:41 AM
Padilla started for Roivas again, although Dmitris was seen limping up and down the touch line for the first time. The rumors were right, and Richter was benched for Ampatis, who made an impressive debut. Syku Lanja, on the other hand, kept his starting job and finally began to prove his mettle on the international stage.

Starters: Lanja, Tangye, Voreght, 백일일, Padilla, Ponten, Xura, Senior, Ikaru, Vermeeren, Ampatis

Substitutions: 45' Pedlar for Tangye, 68' McGuire for Ponten, 76' Frost for Xura

Box score:

CODE
23' Goal: Hyi-san (SNO)
24' Red Card: Senior (NOR)
24' Goal: Ampatis (NOR)
35' Goal: Ampatis (NOR)
68' Goal: Ikaru (NOR)
73' Goal: Vermeeren (NOR)


Manager Alexandre Fréchette, who couldn't stop beaming in the press conference following Norwellia's first international football win, confirmed that Padilla will start for Roivas once more and that Ampatis would start again after an impressively double-penetrative first-eleven debut. James Howe is expected to start in Senior's lieu, in a move that will surely make the flank side of Norwellia's defense just a bit leakier. Howe, however, is expected to contribute some creativity to the Rainbow attack, which may be finding its stride.

Misina Ponten could be sidelined in favor of Sherri McGuire or Mia Frost, neither of whom are in yellow card trouble, unlike Ponten, who has been blamed for failing to generate sufficient forward possession in her time as a starter. Hydoc Pedlar, who impressed Fréchette with his finesse and tenacity in his international debut, may start for Tangye, whose tackles have been seen as dangerously overdone lately.

-------------------------------------
The rest of this post is semi-OOC due to the fact that, in character, the BoF is scheduled to begin after the completion of AOCAF in my time scheme, so these statistics will reflect events that have not officially happened yet in Norwellian football. For example, before AOCAF Matchday 2, a frustrated Fréchette responded to a BoF drubbing by benching every starter who hadn't yet scored a goal for the Warriors--to great success, fundamentally altering the team's makeup. This makes the whole thing a bit of a brain-bender: I'm practically forced to keep the starting lineup and formation mostly static throughout AOCAF, and some players have been benched in the BoF despite having actually scored in AOCAF MD2. Confused yet?

International career Stat-Tracker (includes AOCAF, BoF and ECC):

Goalies

Syku Lanja, 10 caps, 25 GA, 2.50 GAA
Aleksej Glinka, 1 cap, 5 GA
Pavel Kaganovic, 1 cap, 1 GA

Defenders

백일일: 11 caps
Metheven Tangye: 11 caps
Kentisesh Voreght: 11 caps
Hydoc Pedlar: 3 caps, 1 GF
Aaliyah Morris: 3 caps
Kew Gerry: 3 caps
Mason Camus: 1 cap
윤신일 ('Yun Sin-il): 1 cap

Midfielders

Sala Ikaru: 12 caps, 2 GF
Mesit Xura: 12 caps, 1 GF
Barbara Senior: 11 caps
Misina Ponten: 11 caps
Dmitris Roivas: 7 caps
Mia Frost: 6 caps, 2 GF
Chris Padilla: 6 caps
Sherri McGuire: 3 caps, 1 GF
James Howe: 1 cap

Forwards

Alain Vermeeren: 12 caps, 8 GF
Natalia Richter: 8 caps, 2 GF
Nikos Ampatis: 5 caps, 3 GF

Norwellia's overall international record: 3-1-7, 16 GF, 30 GA, -14 GD

Posted by: 95X-Scottfire Apr 23 2009, 10:50 PM
95X Throws Kosovoe Under the Bus In 2-0 Win

STARBLAYDIA–Atlantian Oceania's favorite soccer-playing circus hit the field in their first AOCAF Cup 26 match looking like contenders, with a 2-0 win over Kosovoe.

The first goal was scored by none other than Micah Skokomish, who quickly exploited holes left open by Kosovan defenders, scoring only 17 minutes into the game. Although Kosovoe made adjustments going forward, the ball rarely made it close to the 95X goal. When it did, keeper Tai Doe affirmed his selection to his new keeper role by stopping it every time.

When it was obvious 95X wore down their opponents to the point of exhaustion, late in the second half head coach Chris Tucker turned to his bench to rest his stars.
In no time at all, rookie player Micaela Collina scored her first AOCAF goal in minute 78, making the shortest player in 95X history at 4'2", the believed-to-be only 95X bench player to score a goal in their first game played and the first game of the competition.

Supporters realized the team has a long way to go, and the tournament has just begun. However, even some spectators who came to stare at the "crazy-looking 95X players" with binoculars left the stadium at the end of the match with looks on their faces like they'd never thought anyone like that could play that well.

95X 2, Kosovoe 0
Skokomish (:17), Collina (:78)

Posted by: Cafundéu Apr 25 2009, 05:09 PM
PLAYERS FOUGHT HARD BUT WEREN'T ABLE TO WIN
1x0 result didn't reflect the performance of the Cafundelense team

After the excellent result in the first game of the competition, when the Monopolists defeated The Bear Islands scoring four goals and conceding none, the team had to play against Demot, clearly a stronger team. So, the expectations for the game weren't big, although most supporters believed Cafundéu could make a good performance and even take some points from this game. The coach Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga reinforced this belief, by telling the press that the team was going to impress everyone in the next game. He wasn't wrong, although the result went in Demot's favour.

Cafundéu did the kickoff, and Rafael Nunes nearly scored the goal in the first play of the game, shooting from a long distance while Theros was checking the firmness of the goalposts. Luckily for the Demotian player, the ball went over the bar. Soon after, Demot showed its technical superiority in the game, in a fast play involving three different players, which ended with Ignaci shooting. Radicci appeared over the line to send it for a corner kick. Unfortunately, Zubo took the corner kick perfectly, and Warsin headed to score the goal, which ended to be the only of the game.

But of couse the game wasn't restricted only to the goal. Cafundéu played well, trying to react and score too, but Demot's defence, organized by the coach Renário, had a brilliant day. As time was passing, the supporters couldn't decide if the result was unfair for Cafundéu because of the good performance of the Monopolists or if the result was fair for Demot because of the quality of their defence. The pair Marques and Rafael Nunes, with one creating the chances and the other showing his striker skills worked really well today, but the Cafundelenses were unlucky to not score.

CAFUNDÉU 0x1 DEMOT

CAFUNDÉU: Murilo; Leonardo, Radicci, Schmidt and Luizão; Marcus Vinícius, Nakombi (Bacharel 66'), Marques and Augusto César (Doramílton 81'); Matoso (Cassis 45') and Rafael Nunes.
Coach: Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga.

DEMOT: Theros; Girlodino (Delaruse 74'), Readile, Warsin and Love; Zubo, Orion, Ignaci and Basso (Marath 60'); Rotherwell and Mastaru (Esanar 60')
Coach: Renário.

Goal:DEM: Warsin 10'.

Yellow cards: Schmidt, Luizão, Nakombi and Doramílton (CAF); Theros, Girlodino and Zubo (DEM).

Posted by: 95X-Scottfire Apr 25 2009, 05:39 PM
95X and Norwellia tie, 2-2

STARBLAYDIA–95X and Norwellia played to an impressive 2-2 tie in Match Day 3 of AOCAF Cup 26. Both teams now have 4 total points in the standings, with 95X at 1 win and 1 tie and Norwellia with 1 win, 1 tie, and 1 loss.

Chris Tucker, 95X Head Coach, saw it differently.

"We were way too soft, especially on defense," he commented during the after-game press conference. "I told my team after the game that so what if we tied things up in the end, we came from behind, and we're lucky to have the game in the draw column instead of the loss column."

The match started off balanced, with both teams showing their stuff early. The first goal was scored in the 21st minute, when Ryan Tucker saw a small opening for Melissa/Michelle Mitchell, who capitalized on the play.

He furthermore went on that longtime starting defenders, Crystal Oakenshield and Misty Oakenshield, gave Norwellia too many opportunities, one of which produced the goal by Norwellia's Alain Vermeeren in the 39th minute.

"We play Pacitalia in Match Day 4," commented Tucker to his team at halftime, with the score tied 1-1. "We can't look that far in advance and expect to win today's game."

Shortly after halftime, Norwellia's Natalia Richter scored Norwellia's other goal in the 51st minute.

The game would sit at 2-1 Norwellia until Damien Dairycreek's shot in minute 70, which found its way into the goal.

Much of Tucker's talks throughout the game were analyzed by other members of the media speculating the possibility of lineup changes before the match with Pacitalia. When asked, Tucker refused to acknowledge the question, possibly out of concern for giving the defending AOCAF champions any hints as to what's in store.

95X 2, Norwellia 2
(Mitchell :21, Dairycreek :70), (Vermeeren :39, Richter :51)

(OOC:
Norwellia: Confused yet?
No. I totally get it. Even though two things are happening simultaneously IRL, AOCAF is happening before the other event. BTW, I tried entering some teams in events on the official NS forum... it moves way too fast for me! Having a few days between AOCAF MDs has been nice.)

Posted by: Pacitalia Apr 25 2009, 08:16 PM
"Superhuman" Giurimano tallies five, Foxes knock down Sorthern Northland
Giurimano surpasses overall goals total from AOCAF25 with eight in just two matches

Jhanna, Starblaydia (PSN) — Pacitalian striker Ambrosino Giurimano delivered victory with his first career five-goal match, and the Blue Foxes improved to 2-0-0 at the 26th Atlantian Oceanian Confederation of Association Football Cup with a resounding 7-1 win over group rivals Sorthern Northland.

The Magician now has eight goals in two matches to start the tournament, already surpassing the seven he scored overall in helping Pacitalia capture the championship last time at AOCAF25. Meanwhile, the Blue Foxes are on an offensive tear, tallying 12 goals in 180 minutes of play whilst surrendering just two.

Giurimano put the Blue Foxes ahead decisively very early, scoring on a harmless-looking chip in the 3rd minute. He then followed up with a whistling long-range drive from about 35 yards out to double the Pacitalian lead at 2-0 before even ten minutes had expired on the game clock. It was the Giurimano show from that point on — only twenty minutes into the match, he jumped to convert an Andolfabio Vunghiasso corner, redirecting it past the fingertips of Ben Gaudet to record his second hat trick in as many matches and the tenth of his career.

Giurimano returned the favour in the 37th minute, fording Bernard Labbé and Alan Cooper and passing to a wide-open Vunghiasso, who buried a rocket past Gaudet to make it 4-0. A visibly upset Merginn Moffat punted Gaudet from net and replaced him with Piran Hean to start the second half. He also substituted Labbé, Cooper and the other centre back, Patrick Mills, in a desperate and ultimately unsuccessful attempt to shake things up on defence.

Pacitalia's lone striker up front picked up right where he left off, gathering a laser pass from Michelangelo Mascagnano and deking Hean out of his kit, tossing a confident chip into the heart of the net to put the Blue Foxes ahead 5-0.

The Reds finally responded as Jon Andrews beautifully executed a redirection of Anthony Higgins' corner. The ball reached the scrum in front of net and Abro Zolà was prevented from reeling in the arcing shot. Eventually the ball found its way to Andrews, who pocketed his first of the tournament and, in so doing, spoiled Zolà's bid for a clean sheet.

Massimo da Scupeta joined the club of tournament scorers in the 67th minute, collecting a stray ball and beating Hean far-side with a screaming drive to the top left corner of the net. Then, Giurimano collected his fifth of the match and eighth of the tournament with a low dribbler that squeaked through a falling Hean's arms and sealed the 7-1 victory.

Pacitalia now moves on to play 95X on matchday four. 95X will then play the rested Sortherners, who enjoy a bye day after today's drubbing, on matchday five. 95X has posted a 2-0 win over Kosovoe and a 2-2 stalemate with Norwellia so far at the tournament.

From Starblaydia:
Pacitalia 7 : 1 Sorthern Northland
PAC — Giurimano 3, 7, 20, 49, 82; Vunghiasso 37; da Scupeta 67
SNR — Andrews 58

Next up: 95X v PAC (MD4), SNR v n/a (bye, SNR v 95X on MD5)

Posted by: Sarzonia Apr 26 2009, 04:58 PM
Eighty six minutes into a match that was remarkable for how horrible the pitch was, Sarzonia stared down the barrel of a 1:0 away deficit against Allenmenschen.

The purple-stinging nellie repellent worked to a point. However, the poached egg maker gave Allenmenschen the lead in the ninth minute when midfielder Adam Jones misplayed an attempted clear, drawing the ire of manager Kevin Wilson.

Finally, the Stars sent on forward Joel Jones for Adam Jones in the 53rd minute in an attempt to generate more offence. The move paid dividends in the 86th minute as he drew a penalty kick when onion chopper fouled him in the box. Fellow striker Mike Lohman calmly banged the penalty past welder, giving the Stars a needed away result, 1:1.

For Wilson, the two draws weren't what he'd hoped, but considering the Stars were 0-0-3 in the 25th AOCAF, he was pleased with the improvement.

"It was a good result, a fair result," he said. "We still have room for improvement defensively, but we're starting to see some benefit for the hard work we've put in during training."

Sarzonia (0-2-0) face Septentrionia in a match that Incorporated Football Federation organisers moved to Mike Sarzo Stadium in Nicksia.

"With Cotenshire's political situation unsettled, the Iron Bowl [in Portland] was offered as an alternate 'home' grounds during [the World Bowl] gridball," said IFF chairman Brian Wilson, Kevin's older brother. "Under the circumstances, we wanted to ensure that the Stars have uninterrupted access to either Mike Sarzo Stadium or Bryan Marshall Memorial Stadium."

Septentrionia (0-0-2) are currently in last place in Group 1, but Kevin Wilson said the team wasn't thinking about that.

"We need to get the full three [points for a victory]," he said. "Right now, we've got two points for draws. We need wins."

Posted by: Allemenschen Apr 27 2009, 04:34 PM
AOCAF 26 - Group A
MD1: 2-0 vs Septentrionia
MD2: 1-6 vs Lamoni
MD3: 1-1 vs Sarzonia
MD4: vs Krytenia
MD5: vs #6 BYE
MD6: vs Septentrionia
MD7: vs Lamoni
MD8: vs Sarzonia
MD9: vs Krytenia
MD10: vs #6 BYE


"Who the %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ switched the %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ fixtures?!?"

At that instant, a potty patrol team raced out of the wall, complete with water and bar of soap. They quickly grabbed Koryatsky by the limbs and held him fast while the master machine washed out his mouth with soap while reciting repeatedly, "The use of expletives will not be tolerated in this abode of the Republic. Violators will be subject to the maximum punishment of the law." And when it was all done, Koryatsky could hardly imagine anything but the taste of pale soap in hard water.

"That was disgusting..." he writhed as he turned to Kowak, aimlessly watching the whole affair. "Who turned on the expletive control center?"

"That would be you, Mr. President," Kowak replied. "I do remember that you included uttering the very phrase that is not to be mentioned here to that very list."

"What phrase? I don't remember ever doing that."

"You did it last night, after drinking with the Cabinet. You must have had plenty of things to drink, mostly from overseas contraband. Someone said the phrase which must not be uttered and you decided to turn on the expletive command center. Unfortunately, you forgot to remove all of the other words in the process, but luckily you're the first victim of the week!"

"That's nice, but what was this phrase that I added, so I can remember not to say it?"

"It's the thing you fear most, I believe."

"I fear nothing," Koryatsky said in absolution.

"Right... Well, those things did a good job playing a 1-1 draw against Sarzonia, despite having the wrong schedule for the whole occasion. I do think that the Sarzonians did find an apt repellent, but I think all it did was to stop the buggers from stinging people."

"What were they trying to repel?"

"The thing which I must not utter, lest I wish to be pummeled with soap or worse things."

"I don't get you," Koryatsky said, wondering what this whole business was about. "So the Allemenschen football team played a draw. What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means that we're still in second place, despite having conceded more goals than we shot. It also means that we're doing a lot better anticipated, so the things have planned to build up a lot of stadia around the country so we can get together some really weird teams and have a domestic league."

"I think we've got better things to worry about than funding the construction of football stadia. Like the pestilence of the..."

At that instant, Kowak rushed up and covered Koryatsky's mouth. Koryatsky bit Kowak's hand, unexpectedly.

"What the.......... what was that for?" Koryatsky exclaimed, remembering his little lesson.

"You were about to utter the unutterable phrase."

"Purple-stinging nellies? That's the %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ phrase?"

And no sooner did he say it than did a great host of machines arrived, armed not with water and soap with with boots. Steel toed boots, all of them.

"What's this for?" Koryatsky aptly asked, just as the thunderous horde all aimed the boots at Koryatsky's groin area. Whether any of them hit their target was another matter to discuss; it was needless to say painful.

"I did warn you," Kowak said, casually waltzing away.

Koryatsky looked up at the waltzing Kowak, and replied with a much higher pitch, "That you did..."

Posted by: Allemenschen Apr 30 2009, 05:27 PM
AOCAF 26 - Group A
MD1: 2-0 vs Septentrionia
MD2: 1-6 vs Lamoni
MD3: 1-1 vs Sarzonia
MD4: 1-0vs Krytenia
MD5: vs #6 BYE
MD6: vs Septentrionia
MD7: vs Lamoni
MD8: vs Sarzonia
MD9: vs Krytenia
MD10: vs #6 BYE


"GAH!!!! PURPLE STINGING NELLIES!!!"

"Where?!?" Kowak yelled, as he had his Purple-Stinging Nellie Patrol Cap upon his head. It was brightly colored hot-pink purple, as a way to ward off the nellies, although no independent lab ever confirmed that they actually worked. Beyond that, Kowak was on the look-out for purple-stinging nellies.

"ON THE TV!!!"

Kowak gazed at the TV, while a petrified President Koryatsky simply pointed in terror. Kowak tapped the TV and surely the purple-stinging nellies didn't come off.

"I believe that's on the TV broadcast, not the TV, Marek..." Kowak said, annoyed that he'd put on his whole attire just for this madness.

"I know. They're on TV! If people catch wind of the fact that there are purple-stinging nellies, they might think better of them!!!"

Kowak, glancing at the TV, shook his head. "Begging your pardon, Marek... if they don't know what a purple-stinging nellie is at this point, they're better off feeding carp to a bunch of SLANI tourists. Speaking of which, your ten o'clock is coming right on schedule. Don't forget that SLANI tourists only want fresh carp, not partially frozen trout with carp heads sowen on to make them look like carp."

"I get it," Koryatsky said, picking up his chum bucket. He checked his watch. "OMFZG!!! It's 9:55!!!"

Kowak seemed confused. "Of course, it's 9:55..."

"I have to get to the chum spot! In five minutes!"

Kowak glanced off to the side, where a glamorous balcony sat waiting for the President to dispense his filthy load of fish. Some early biters were already at the site. Unable to grasp how Koryatsky could be late for the occasion, he pointed over to the spot just to be sure. "It's right over there, Marek."

"I know. But you never know with the purple-stinging nellies! They could kidnap you and make you late!"

"They only steal you away to the Cabinet Chamber."

"And that crazy Cabinet still thinks it's a helicopter!!!"

"We could just move the SLANI tourist feeding area..."

"No!!! Those Capitalizts don't like us changing the whole thing on a whim!!! Otherwise, they'll go somewhere else for their carp and tuna!"

"And why exactly do we feed them carp and tuna, not previously partially frozen trout with carp heads?"

"Because they're nasty sharks that prey upon the weak and powerless proletariat. They're ravenous warmongers who throw the lives of the workers' union to the whims of their imperialistic aims!"

Kowak nodded. "Isn't that just a figure of speech?"

"No. They really are sharks. Feeding them carp is the only way we can get their money."

"Alright. If that suits you."

Koryatsky looked to the clock. 9:58.

"I'm going to be late!!!"

"Here's let's just take a simple walk over to the other side..."

"NOOO!!!"

Koryatsky reached out to grab Kowak, just as a giant horde of purple-stinging nellies rushed down the main thoroughfare of the hallway, creating a thick impenetrable wall of purple-stinging nellies, trapping them in the TV room, as well as blocking their path to the SLAIN tourist feeding balcony.

"Oh..."

"We're trapped!"

"Thanks for stating the obvious..."

"How will we get out??? HOW???"

"We could try going through the crowd?"

"And risk getting touched by those filthy things?" Koryatsky retorted vehemently. "I think not."

"And how long does this normally last?"

"Two minutes."

"Ah, I see your predicament then..." Kowak turned back to the TV. "We could try watching some news. See? The Allemenschen football team beat those Krytie bastards."

"Why'd they beat up some crying bastards?"

"I mean they played against the team from Krytenia and managed to win the game 1-0. I think those androids are getting better, because that's two goals scored by androids."

"Yep. That android coach is sure doing a good job...at doing whatever it is that android coaches do."

"Yep. Mixing the androids with the purple-stinging nellies is an excellent compromise..."

"WHA?"

Posted by: Norwellia May 1 2009, 03:32 AM
Norwellia 2 - Kosovoe 1

Starting lineup: Lanja, 백일일, Tangye, Voreght, Senior, Ponten,

Ikaru, Padilla, Xura, Vermeeren, Richter

3' Goal: Padilla (NOR), 1
9' Goal: Kosovoe
42' Sub: Gerry for Tangye
74' Goal: Ponten (NOR), 1

International Stat-Tracker:

Goalies

Syku Lanja - 12 caps, 28 GA, 2.33 GAA
Pavel Kaganovic - 2 caps, 1 GA, 1 SO
Aleksej Glinka - 1 cap, 5 GA

Defenders

백일일, 13 caps
Metheven Tangye, 13 caps
Kentisesh Voreght, 13 caps
Kew Gerry, 5 caps
Hydoc Pedlar, 4 caps, 1 GF
Aaliyah Morris, 4 caps
Mason Camus, 2 caps
윤신일 ('Yun Sin-il), 1 cap

Midfielders

Sala Ikaru, 15 caps, 4 GF
Mesit Xura, 15 caps, 1 GF
Misina Ponten, 13 caps, 1 GF
Chris Padilla, 8 caps, 1 GF
Mia Frost, 7 caps, 2 GF
Dmitris Roivas, 7 caps
Sherri McGuire, 3 caps, 1 GF
James Howe, 2 caps

Forwards

Alain Vermeeren, 15 caps, 10 GF
Natalia Richter, 11 caps, 3 GF
Nikos Ampatis, 6 caps, 3 GF
Doshese Pagliloe, 1 cap

Posted by: Lamoni May 1 2009, 06:22 PM
Ummmm... this is the RP thread, not the roster thread.

Posted by: Allemenschen May 2 2009, 11:15 AM
QUOTE (Lamoni @ May 2 2009, 12:22 AM)
Ummmm... this is the RP thread, not the roster thread.

The international communication was immediately perceived as not-usual communications coming from Lamoni. And all it started was a modest rush at the communications controls somewhere in Allemenschen...

"Maybe they don't know that that was an RP?"

"What the heck is an RP?"

"I don't know either."

"Well... who wants some pistachios?"

"I DO!!!"

Posted by: Allemenschen May 10 2009, 03:46 PM
AOCAF 26 - Group A
MD1: 2-0 vs Septentrionia
MD2: 1-6 vs Lamoni
MD3: 1-1 vs Sarzonia
MD4: 1-0 vs Krytenia
MD5: vs #6 BYE
MD6: 3-1 vs Septentrionia
MD7: vs Lamoni
MD8: vs Krytenia
MD9: vs Sarzonia
MD10: vs #6 BYE


Koryatsky was confused by the reports. Kowak was confused as to why Koryatsky was confused in the first place.

"So we're playing the World Cup 46 Qualifiers?" Koryatsky asked.

"Yes."

"And we playing in the AOCAF 26 Group A?"

"Yes."

"Well, how the ... bleep are we managing that task?"

"It's called time-dilation series."

"Wha?"

At that, the platform folded into a lab stage, whereupon countless numbers of scientists, reesearchers, SLANI tourists, and the whatnot were conducting the oblivious routines. Kowak led Koryatsky on the personal tour. "These machines are helping to maintain Allemenschen within the NS universe, which requires quite a few things. That machine over there keeps us 'logged in' into the universe. It's just something that says we exist. That machine helps sustain our 'logged in' state over a period of 28 days. If we wanted to, we could extend it by a good 32 days, and make it 60 days. And this machine registers our national polity, for the daily WA census tours."

"Well, that's all interest and all," Koryatsky said, "but where's the machine that makes us possible to play two matches at the same time for different reasons?"

"Oh, that would be TIMMY."

"TIMMY?"

"Yes. Temporal-Inflation-Macro-Management-Yodeller."

"What the ... bleep is the yodeller part for?"

"Because yodelling is the only way that time-dilation actually works. How else can you expect to play two football games at the same time?"

"I... don't... work... but it gives me an idea..."

"Well, too bad yodelling can't help us win World Cup games. Even though we did manage a win with those crappy androids away at Carpathia and Ruthenia..."

"I thought that was a home game."

"Oh, yeah. The other team didn't want to play in Allemenschen, so they rescheduled the match for a venue in a more convenient spot."

"Which is?"

"Some place called... 'Fort Boston'."

"Those androids are playing a match on a military installation somewhere?"

Posted by: Cafundéu May 13 2009, 10:18 PM
MONOPOLISTS "B" TEAM WITH PROMISING PERFORMANCES
Good games show that team has good players ready to play for the main team

After playing five games, the Cafundelense National Team sent to the AOCAF Cup is in the second position at the standings, with seven points. Although many people can say that seven points in five games isn't a good record, we must remember them that Cafundéu has just entered the competition in this edition, and that the expected performance was worse than what is happening now. With two wins, one draw and two losses, the "B" team of the Monopolists is doing a fine job, and many of its players are already being considered as certain players of the main National Team in a short amount of time. But, even if none of the players reach the main NT in time for the next World Cup, at least one member of this AOCAF Cup has a guaranteed spot: the coach Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga.

The CCFM has announced today that Gilsoweller Veiga will be the coach of the National Team starting in the World Cup qualifiers for the next cup, which are expected to begin two months after the end of the AOCAF. Veiga is expected to bring some players of the AOCAF team into the main NT. Rumours are around the names of Rafael Nunes, Pedrinho, Marcus Vinícius, Nakombi and Leonardo, but even more can be used. Also, this decision helped Veiga to sign a nice sponsorship deal with Canfudean, the country's most popular brand of canned food, which will use the popular coach in some of their new advertisements. Last but not least, things are getting strange inside the CCFM, and many people comment that the president, Carlos Alberto Urubupungá, has done something wrong and is being pursued by the Empire's police. Substitutes for his position are being considered.

Posted by: Allemenschen May 18 2009, 10:26 PM
AOCAF 26 - Group A
MD1: 2-0 vs Septentrionia
MD2: 1-6 vs Lamoni
MD3: 1-1 vs Sarzonia
MD4: 1-0 vs Krytenia
MD5: vs #6 BYE
MD6: 3-1 vs Septentrionia
MD7:1-6 vs Lamoni
MD8: vs Sarzonia
MD9: vs Krytenia
MD10: vs #6 BYE


The slight hum of Handel playing upon some old phonograph in the background echoed throughout the Cabinet's quarters while Koryatsky and Kowak sat down for tea. It was herbal tea. And it was their time for afternoon tea. And in the accordance of the great Allemenschen tradition, tea was always served nude, because in reflection of the natural products that were on service, it was appropriate to present oneself naturally, without any perturbation that clothing would present. Even the purple-stinging nellies that scurried about the place were shaven (although that was a bit of an unnatural thing, it was just to get Koryatsky comfortable with the idea that they were now working inside the government). Yes, ever since AFLAC took over the armed forces of the country, they have been a busy presence at the Republican Palace.

"Forsooth, 'tis a good day for footy, aye?" Kowak asked.

"I'll spoil the result. Androids got slaughted 6-1. Thanks to that phone dialer who disconnected."

Both Koryatsky and Kowak gazed at the purple-stinging nellie, who managed to speak with the aid of a rubbing belly translator vocalization machine. They nodded and went about tea time.

Koryatsky leaned over, saying, "I wonder if those bovine geese have actually invaded Sorthern Northland yet."

"They said that they would, but they were having problems getting there."

"What's the problem then?"

Kowak shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know. Something about random natural migration of fellow mates not yet prepared. As if they're waiting for reinforcements."

"From where?"

*** somewhere in Terra Anatidae ***

An assembly of geese, ducks, swans, and otherwise anatid fowl gathered upon a big flat stone. They quacked angrily, showing pictures of drunk Sortherners at the same time quacking even louder. Finally, the whole parade of birds crashed upon the frame of pictures of Sortherners as they tore away the pictures beak by beak.

*** back in Allemenschen ***

Kowak shruged his shoulders again. "I haven't a clue."

"Well... we'd better act quickly," Koryatsky remarked. "Or else we might forget why we're invading them."

"Speaking of which, why are we invading them again?"

"To intimidate someone."

"Who?"

"I don't know. Ask those birds."

(ooc: hooray for no ads at the top!)

Posted by: Allemenschen May 23 2009, 10:08 PM
AOCAF 26 - Group A
MD1: 2-0 vs Septentrionia
MD2: 1-6 vs Lamoni
MD3: 1-1 vs Sarzonia
MD4: 1-0 vs Krytenia
MD5: vs #6 BYE
MD6: 3-1 vs Septentrionia
MD7:1-6 vs Lamoni
MD8: 0-1 vs Sarzonia
MD9: vs Krytenia
MD10: vs #6 BYE


Koryatsky was busily strolling around the Republican Palace one fine morning when he noticed that Kowak was walking in the opposite direction, wearing naught but a pair of fanny pants. It would have been odd enough that Kowak was wearing just fanny pants, but the moment he noticed it, everyone seemed to be wearing fanny pants, and it boggled him out. Why was everyone wearing fanny pants? He checked himself, just to make sure he wasn't wearing fanny pants (and thank goodness, no, he wasn't). So what was the occasion? A parade?

"What's with the fancy boy, wearing his shirt and trousers?" Kowak said, pointing oddly at Koryatsky. "He's the only odd chap not wearing his plaid fanny pants, cheering for the Allemenschen National Football Team!"

"Wha?" Sometimes, he seriously thought that he was the only sane one of the bunch. Then again, he forgot that sanity was an exclusive trait known only to foreigners. The concept of "sane" was foreign to Allemenschen, which explained why everyone else tried to avoid it at all. Still, the fact that everyone was laughing at him was a sore sight, especially since they were wearing fanny pants, and he was not. But what was it about fanny pants that made it special to the Allemenschen National Football Team? He didn't dare ask that question, but hopefully inevitably, it would leak out in the crowd.

Kowak, seeing that Koryatsky had no idea, went over and grabbed him by the shoulder - uncomfortably close to his hairy build.

"You see, ever since AFLAC took over the armed forces of Allemenschen, people have been wearing these fanny pants. And I don't know why we started to wear them, but they're mighty comfortable, and you know - I think it's much better than wearing all of that bulky 'clothing'. You see... it's bulky... and it's clothing. I'd rather live free! And expose myself to the world! Why hide in some overbearing cloak of oppression? I mean, it's a drab brown color! I looks like something I poop every Thursday after crumpets and tea. But you... you know we can get rid of all of these ridiculous costumes. We could make it illegal, and then we'd all be of like mind and like body..."

"GAH!!!!!!!!!!" Koryatsky yelled. "WEIRD PEOPLE!" He darted off in one direction, whilst being chased by the horde of fanny-pants-dressed people. "They want me to wear fanny pants!"

But all of the sudden, he encountered a grizzly wall of purple-stinging nellies! He shrieked as the purple-stinging nellies and the fanny-wearing people crowd surrounded him. Kowak emerged from their midst, holding in his hand a horrific pair of fanny-pants. "You will wear them!" he said in an ominous tone. "You will wear them!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

Koryatsky woke up. Egads! What a horrible dream! He turned over to his clock, still gazing at him, 11:37 in the morning. OH FUDGE, how long had he been asleep? He quickly got out of the bed and rushed straight to work. Oh, he hoped that he didn't miss anything important. By this time, they were discussing the Council for the new Council's budget!

It'd been a big problem ever since AFLAC came on, now they needed money to buy the guns and stuff that AFLAC needed to invade Sorthern Northland. But Councils were the only way that they could get the money. And they needed a Council to set up that Council. It was an endless cycle, but Koryatsky saw reason to attend this one indeed. He only hoped that he wasn't too late to offer his opinion on the matter.

"Mr. President," Kowak said, alarmed by Koryatsky's late arrival. "What the %$#^ is that that you're wearing?"

Koryatsky gazed at himself. It was the fanny pants!

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

Koryatsky woke up...

Posted by: Cafundéu May 26 2009, 09:19 PM
MONOPOLISTS IN TOP FORM
Veiga's team qualifies to quarterfinals!

The team commanded by Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga continues surprising in the AOCAF. In the first half of the group stage, the team could have some good performances, and reaching a position that wasn't the one expected before the beginning of the competition. And in the second half things were even better for the team, with an outstanding second place which sent the team to the quarterfinals of the competition. The 3x0 win over Koseli Cumhuriyetler is a proof that this team has a lot of talent, enough to leave a good impression on the minds of the Cafundelenses and of foreigners. Now there is the hope that they'll be able to continue playing well, to make a historical campaign in the first AOCAF of the country. Of course, the team is already doing a marvellous campaign, but there's always space for more.

These good results motivate the supporters for the World Cup, which qualifying stage will start soon. With the name of Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga already confirmed as the new coach of the main National Team, his job with the AOCAF team is considered as a good example of what he can do with a team. Most of the players called are doing a good job, from the young Rafael Nunes to the support player Fugiro Nakombi. Of course, as in every team there are players that didn't have good performances, as Doramílton and Cassis, and these probably won't receive chances in the main National Team soon. Now Veiga is getting the team prepared for a minor tactical change, and the AOCAF team will start to be slightly more offensive, as the main NT is.

Posted by: Lamoni May 27 2009, 12:39 AM
Hawks Slaughter Group 1, go to the knockouts

While it has been sometime since we have last said anything about AOCAF 26, we have come to the end of the group stage. And what a ride it has been for the Hawks. Going through ten matchdays, the Hawks won seven matches, had one draw, and two bye days. The majority of the matches in this group stage were decided by margins of five or six goals, which either shows that the Hawks are in this AOCAF with a vengeance, or that they were facing woefully unprepared opposition.

Either way, the Hawks must now prepare for the knockouts, facing Norwellia. Not much is known about this team, but they managed to come in second place in Group 4, so that says something for them already. Of course, this is the same group in which Pacitalia posted a record goal difference of 33, and garnered 24 points, while Lamoni tied with Starblaydia with 22 points. Lamoni's goal difference came in at 21, which is 12 behind that of Pacitalia.

Needless to say, this has been one of the best group stages in Lamonian AOCAF history, which stretches through every AOCAF since AOCAF 3. Winning three AOCAF cups in this span of time, the Hawks are looking to catch up to the totals of Vilita and NEWI Cefn Druids, who both hold four AOCAF cups. After this feat has been accomplished, the Hawks plan to catch up to the Starblaydi Purple Menace, and their record breaking number of AOCAF cup wins.

In the meantime, the Hawks will keep their concentration on their upcoming match with Norwellia, studying film of their matches against the other nations in Group Four, in order to see if this squad has any weaknesses that the Hawks can exploit in the upcoming match.

There was a time when Starblaydia thought that they could win the entire tournament on Lamonian soil. While this would have been ironic (both sides were... not exactly enemies, but more like rivals at the time), it was not to be. However, the Hawks will have an excellent chance to win the cup in Starblaydia. While this would still be a feat by any means, it would no longer have the historic significance that it might once have had.

In any case, the winner of the Lamoni/Norwellia match will go on to face the winner of the Bazalonia/Cafundéu match; while the winner of the Starblaydia/Nojika match will face the winner of the Pacitalia/Krytenia match. Our predictions for the final four stand as follows: Lamoni, Bazalonia, Starblaydia, and Pacitalia. However, we would not be surprised if Cafundéu managed to pull an upset over our Bazalonian friends.

In any case, the Semi-finals and finals will truly be a clash of the AOCAF Titans, and only the best team will remain standing when it is over.

Posted by: Pacitalia May 29 2009, 03:10 AM
Blue Foxes round out Group D with perfect record
Pacitalia says it is confident about defending its title from AOCAF25

Ambrosino Giurimano tucked away two goals, bringing his tournament total to a record-setting 23, as the Blue Foxes turned in yet another dominating performance in downing Kosovoe 5-0 in Starblaydia to close out their round-robin play.

Pacitalia finished the round-robin at 8-0-0, with an unprecedented 40 goals (5.0 per match) scored during the process. Foxes captain and starting keeper Abro Zolà also posted the second-best record among the 20 sides at the tournament, conceding just seven goals over the eight match span, or 0.875 per match. The Hawks, always a contender, let in just five goals in Group A over the same period.

The Blue Foxes, by virtue of finishing first in Group D, and clear of fellow group qualifiers Norwellia (4-2-2) by 10 points, will face a familiar foe in the quarterfinals — the Aces. It will essentially be a redo of last year's quarterfinal match, which the Blue Foxes took 3-0 en route to their first championship victory. Krytenia have been one of the tournament's stalwarts and never fail to be dangerous opposition. But Zolà says the Foxes will be prepared to face the Aces.

"We aren't taking any of our opposition lightly, and we surely won't do that for Krytenia," Zolà said. "Krytenia always fields a talented, hardworking side and they get the results they are after when they are on their game. It will be up to us to ensure we control the flow of the match and play the game we want to play."

When asked how the Blue Foxes felt going into the knockouts, manager Marco van Basten responded: "Cautiously confident."

The Aces are coming off a decent showing in the round-robin. Lamoni dominated Group A coming out of it with a 7-1-0 record and 26 goals scored in the process. As mentioned the Hawks conceded just five. Krytenia qualified a distant second in Group A with a 4-1-3 record, witnessing only 19 goals (11 for, 8 against) during the round-robin. Regrettably, the Stars, in their second campaign since returning to the AOCAF competition, failed to qualify for the knockout stage, finishing the round-robin fourth in Group A at 2-2-4. The result was still a marked improvement over Sarzonia's winless showing at AOCAF25.

The other qualifiers are Bazalonia and Nojika from Group B and Starblaydia and Cafundéu from Group C. The Panthers finished AOCAF25 in fourth place while the Purple Peril fell in the final match on penalty kicks to the Blue Foxes.

From Jhanna, Starblaydia:
Kosovoe 0 : 5 Pacitalia
KOS — none
PAC — Giurimano 31, 58 / Vunghiasso 47, 77 / da Scupeta 87

Next up: PAC v KRY (QF), KOS v n/a (eliminated)

Posted by: Starblaydia May 30 2009, 09:09 AM
Last Four: Big Four
Starblaydia face Pacitalia in Semis

First plays third. Second plays fourth. Six-time champs versus the reigning champs, three-time champs versus the highest ranked team never to win one. We're not here to claim this is the dream choice Semi line-up, the neutral's choice, the statistician's choice or the choice of anything other than the fans' involved, it is merely what has happened and the top four will further get a grip on the regional rankings. Pacitalia have won every match, Starblaydia and Lamoni have not lost a match, while Bazalonia have just one defeat to their names in the competition so far. Whether it is to be the slow and steady Bazalonians, the lighting hare of Pacitalia, the Starblaydi juggernaut or the Lamonian machine, the AOCAF Cup Champion will have deserved their victory.

Starblaydia's key players have been their strikers. Carnophin Narquelie has taken his tally from two to eight during the nine games played, while fro mthe bench eighteen year-old striker Soraya Roshanak has shown just how good she will surely become by slotting five goals in six games. With the forty-sixth World Cup looming, at least one of them will have put their names in the shop window for selection.

Starblaydia haven't played Pacitalia since the final four years ago where they lost on penalties. Starblaydia only managed to score one of the three they took, while the Blue Foxes netted all four. Hopefully a stamina-sapped hundred and twenty minutes plus penalties won't be required before one team is sent through to the Final, but surely whoever comes out on top here will be the favourite to take the title.

The say form is temporary, but class is permanent. Pacitalia may have taken their first title in the last tournament, but Starblaydia have six of them. Their Semi-Final itself will simply be down to who plays better, and who is luckier, on the day.

Posted by: Lamoni May 30 2009, 11:35 PM
Hawks advance to the finals

To get to this point, the Hawks went 7-1-0 in the group stage; dominating Group A by allowing only five goals to be scored against us, while scoring twenty six goals of our own. The Hawks defense has therefore allowed the fewest goals in the group stage, and a continuation of this trend would serve the Hawks well in the knockouts.

The Hawks averaged five or six goals against their opponents, proving that all that Lamonian AOCAF experience (being in every AOCAF since AOCAF 3) helps out on the field of play. The three AOCAF Cup wins haven't hurt, either; even though the Hawks are looking to collect cup number four here in AOCAF twenty six. While most of the old political irony of winning a cup in the Starblaydi heartland is gone, a small spark of Lamonian nationalism does remain; and seriously, who would not agree that joining the ranks of those nations who have won four or more AOCAF Cups would not be a bright spot for any Atlantian Oceania nation?

After the group stages, the Hawks went on to defeat Norwellia with a scoreline of 3-0, setting up a match in the semi-finals against longtime friends Bazalonia. In the other semi-final matchup, Starblaydia will face Pacitalia to see who will be the other anchor of the AOCAF twenty six first place finals match. As for Lamoni, we have history on our side against Bazalonia, and facing either Pacitalia or Starblaydia in the finals will be a challenge for any team in AO. However, we know that neither team is invincible, and either one can be defeated when the right conditions are met. Lamoni's three AOCAF Cup wins are a facet of evidence in this direction.

Lamoni harbors no grudge against Bazalonia, and the spirit of this semi-finals match can best be described as a match between friends that you might have had after school. Though, the stakes are higher than they were back in school, this friendly atmosphere has not.

Posted by: Pacitalia Jun 4 2009, 05:07 AM
Foxes outduel Aces, Purple Peril to reach final
Pacitalia once again relies on penalty shootout to down region's top side

Jhanna, Starblaydia (PSN) — Pacitalia's red-hot Blue Foxes are one match victory away from defending their championship title from AOCAF25. The Foxes slid past strong rivals from Krytenia by a 3-1 margin and relied once more on penalties to down the vaunted Purple Peril of Starblaydia, 2-2 (2-2 AET, 4-1 PK). In reaching the final they will face the team that captured the title before them, Lamoni's Hawks.

The Hawks were formerly notorious for being the Blue Foxes' bogey team. The Pacitalians have had some of their worst results against Lamoni but the two squads have not seen each other for a while. The Foxes are arguably much more improved in all facets of their game, most especially up front with what has proved the most dangerous offence in the regional tournament. Pacitalia's front four have posted all but three of 45 goals in the 10 matches in which the Blue Foxes have played.

Foxes striker Ambrosino Giurimano has posted a career-defining performance with 25 of Pacitalia's 45 goals. He tallied 23 of Pacitalia's 40 round-robin markers and is responsible for two of the Foxes' five so far in the knockouts. Tournament organisers say the effort is very likely an all-time record at the AOCAF Cup.

"I feel good going in [to the final]," Giurimano told PSN Tuesday. "I haven't had any struggles so far and I am hoping to keep it that way. I've been fortunate to be able to lead the type of attack that we are looking for and that despite facing different opponents with very different styles of play. So I feel good. I think we all do. It would be great to defend our title, of course, and we're confident... but we're not getting ahead of ourselves."

Left-side midfielder Andolfabio Vunghiasso, who has seven goals for Pacitalia at AOCAF26, echoed the sentiment.

"We fully understand what is ahead of us, just as we did in the last two rounds of the knockouts," Vunghiasso said. "With Krytenia and Starblaydia, you couldn't ask for a tougher pair of sides to face on your way to the final."

But, he said, winning in the final over that Starblaydi side gave them a shot in the arm and steadied them for the re-match, which again came down to penalties. Pacitalia and Krytenia also faced each other in the last tournament, meeting in the quarterfinal.

"So we have had basically two big-ticket rematches on our way back to the final," Vunghiasso added, "and if that's not enough of a tough situation, our opponents have been very even matchups."

Bazalonia was the final component of the last four in AOCAF26, and as Starblaydi media reported, the results mean the four nations cement their hold on the regional rankings. Starblaydia top the current table, followed by Lamoni (2nd), third-ranked Pacitalia and Bazalonia in fourth.

A Hawks win in the final will mean Lamoni's fourth title, putting them closer to their dream of matching archrival Starblaydia's record six championships. On the other hand, a successful defence of their title on the part of the Blue Foxes will mean Pacitalia's second title in their third appearance in the final, and a whirlwind end to a tournament in which the Foxes are now 10-for-10 in overall match play.

From AOCAF26 in Starblaydia
Pacitalia 3 : 1 Krytenia
PAC — Vunghiasso 9 / Giurimano 52 / Tomás 79
KRY — Harrison 43

Starblaydia 2 : 2 (2:2 AET, 1:4 PK) Pacitalia
STB — Narquelie 29 / Soronúmë 42
PAC — Giurimano 38 / Mascagnano 70

Penalties
STB — Soronúmë, Narquelie, Bazrimar, (Hyo-Jin, Dante)
PAC — da Scupeta, Giurimano, Vunghiasso, Seriesta, (Semih Mansur)

Next up: STB v BAZ (3PPO), LAM v PAC (F)

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