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The following letter was sent to the leaders of all Atlantian Oceania nations. Accompanying the letter is a delicious fruit basket, and several bottles of the finest Aurendian liquors, sent as a token of friendship.
QUOTE | To [insert appropriate foreign minister-type person], [insert name of nation]
Greetings from the Republic of Aurendia!
Some of you may have interacted with our national football squad, others we have never dealt with before. Nonetheless, the time has come for the Republic of Aurendia to formally open relations with our fellow Atlantian Oceanian nations.
For far too long our government has avoided official contact with other nations. No person ever left the nation on government business. No ambassadors have ever crossed our borders. No foreign leader has ever received so much as a “Hello” from this government.
The time has come for this behavior to change. Consider the enclosed fruit basket and booze as a gesture of friendship from our nation to yours. We eagerly look forward to many positive and fruitful interactions between our great nations.
Sincerely, Ms. Kalle Monoa, President of the Republic Ms. Anya Symondsi, Minister of State
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Falcon munched the apple. "It's good fruit, I'll grant them that. I hope to enjoy the liquor later." He paused, and turned to his secretary. "Anna, my dear, have my chef prepare some Falcon á Paolo, and have it sent to these newcomers along with a bottle of something nice from the cellars. The Pinot Grigio of '89 would be ideal, the lead-coated bottle kept out most of the gamma radiation." |
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Falcania |
Winging It Since 2004 |
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Posts: 776 |
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VP of Commerce Drake Richards sat at his desk and drank a glass of Aurendia's finest vintage.
"Mmmm... it's good, I'll give them that. They sure know how to open diplomatic relations well."
Placing the glass down on the red mahogany of his office desk, he began writing a response to Aurendia's telegram. When he was finished, he called for one of his aides, handed him the telegram, and said:
"Send this to Aurendia immediately. Also, send them back a bottle of wine. One from the government cellar." He thought for a moment. "One of the Algeron stock. Perhaps one of the 69 vintage. Raspberry Ice wine. Always a favourite. And also, put them on the schedule for the trade tour later this month."
"Is that all sir?"
"Yes. Your dismissed."
QUOTE | To: Ms. Kalle Monoa, President of the Republic From: Drake Richards, VP of Commerce, The Incorporated States of United Meridian
On behalf of CEO Brendan Steven, and the people of the ISUM, I would like to offer to place you on the schedule for the ISUM Globalization Trade Tour later on this year. We will be visiting many countries in the Atlantian Oceania region and we would love to visit you as well. I await your reply.
Regards, Drake Richards Vice President of Commerce, The Incorporated States of United Meridian ISUM Headquarters, Meridian City
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Stone tried the liquor first. It was very good indeed. Then he called an aide in to send the following message, along with a dozen bottles of Flag lable Lamodka.
QUOTE | To:Ms. Kalle Monoa, President of the Republic Ms. Anya Symondsi, Minister of State Aurendia
From: President Stone Free Republic of Lamoni
The Free Republic thanks you for the gifts of liquor and fruit that have accompanied your diplomatic greeting. We welcome you to the region of Atlantian Oceania as friends. I am currently in Carrar on a state visit as this message is being sent to you, but I am open to a visit of your nation as soon as I am finished here. In addition, we would like to see an embassy and cultural exchange. We are attaching a picture of a possible embassy in our capitol city of Nephi that you could take over. Thank you again for your gifts. |
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Lamoni |
Democratic Maniac |
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Posts: 1952 |
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From the desk of Robber Captain Ug-Mt
Ms. Kalle Monoa, President of the Republic Ms. Anya Symondsi, Minister of State,
We in Az-cz are glad to recieve your fine offer. We enjoyed our match against your fine country in the Baptism of Fire and hope to establish a long and fruitful friendship with your country. We have sampled your fruits and must say they are splendid. What is the fruit that looks like a pink banana but that tastes like a kind of raspberry. It is truly divine. We would love to import that plant and begin growing it ourselves. As a token of appreciation we will be sending some native Az-czid goods to your country. Also we invite you to join the Kleptochase competitions. Although you are too late to register for the first Atlantian Oceania competition, you can still sign up for the world championships and of course compete in the second AOKCC. We also would like to organize an embassy exchange.
With respects,
Ug-Mt |
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Az-cz |
Senator in Training |
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Posts: 246 |
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"Attention Prime Minister, we just recieved a letter." an aide said, sticking his head into the office.
"So? We get a lot of letters." Elisar said, his feet up on his desk.
"This one came with booze."
Elisar blinked. "Hurry up, bring it in." Glancing at the bottles arrayed on the desk, he read the letter quickly. "We could get along with these people. Draft a letter."
"Yes, sir."
"Dear whatstheirname, thank you for your kind gift, and would be most interested in the opening of peaceful relations. However, as we don't have happily-prebuilt locations prepared for foriegn embassies, the Foriegn Ministery will have to search for a suitable location for your foriegn mission. However, while this process is underway, we happily invite you as our guests to come and enjoy a bit of the barley soda and take part in some friendly drinking competitions. Ari Elisar, blah blah blah. Got it?"
"Yes, sir, we'll send it right away."
"Fantastic." |
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Casari |
Dedicated Scribe |
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Posts: 79 |
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To: Richard Menszae, Minister of Foreign Affairs and Trade, Bazalonia
Mr. Menszae, I share the belief that a nation’s favorite drinks can tell a lot about them, and if Forhey’s is any indication, yours is a mighty fine nation.
We will need a few weeks to finish work on appropriate structures, but an embassy-exchange would be most welcome. In the meantime Mr. Heath is more than welcome to operate out of temporary space in our capital Three Rivers.
If it is reasonable, we request that our embassy buildings match the same strict environmental sustainability standards that we require our own buildings to meet. If this is acceptable, you can expect Jack McManus as our ambassador.
Signed, Anya Symondsi, Minister of State
---------------------------------------------------- To: King Falcon, Falcania From: Anya Symondsi, Minister of State
Thank you for your response. The Falcon a Paolo was magnificent, and the ’89 Pinot complemented it very nicely. I hope that we can communicate further in the future.
This post has been edited by Aurendia on Aug 25 2006, 01:25 AM |
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To: Drake Richards, VP of Commerce, Incorporated States of United Meridian
Mr. Richards, Thank you for the ’69 Algernon. A beverage of such quality reflects well on your nation as a whole. Aurendia will gladly receive you during your Globalization Trade Tour later this year.
Signed, Anya Simondsi, Minister of State
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- To: President Stone, Free Republic of Lamoni From: Kalle Monoa, President of the Republic Anya Symondsi, Minister of State
Let us open by thanking you for the excellent Lamodka. Once your current travels are finished, you will be welcome to visit our nation at any time. We accept the offer of an embassy and cultural exchange. The building selected for our use seems to meet our standards, and Kyle Parkhurst has been selected as our representative in Nephi. At the moment we are finishing up construction on the Lamoni Embassy, but it should be complete within a few weeks. As an initial form of cultural exchange, we propose student exchanges and study abroad programs between Aurendian and Lamoni schools and universities. We look forward to bringing our great nations closer together. |
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To: Robber Captain Ug-Mt From: Kalle Monoa, President of the Republic Anya Symondsi, Minister of State Martin Waneiwa, Minister of the Environment
We also remember our match against your Gnomes in the Baptism of Fire, although we do wish the result had gone differently. With respect to entry in the Kleptochase championships, this is a nation with a very athletic populace, so there is a very good chance we will participate in many more sporting events.
We are glad to hear that you like the highland zillifruit, and you can certainly expect more shipments headed your way. We are however wary of exporting the plant itself, as it could cause problems for the environment of Az-Cz. The highland zillifruit grows extremely quickly, and spreads rapidly thanks to aerial dispersion of its seeds. Additionally, while the fruit itself is very nutritious and delicious, the leaves of the zillifruit tree are filled with a potent defensive toxin. In its native cloud-forest habitat there are several herbivores that have co-evolved with the zillifruit, and are thus unaffected by these toxins. As far as we can tell native Az-Cz species are unlikely to have any immunity to the zillifruit’s toxins, and combined with the rapid spread of the plant, there will not be any defense against the plant becoming an exotic invasive species.
An embassy exchange is acceptable between Az-Cz and Aurendia. Elizabeth Vanderhall has already been selected to serve as ambassador.
------------------------------------------------------ To: Ari Elizar, Prime Minister, Confederated Colonies of Casari From: Kalle Monoa, President of the Republic Anya Symondsi, Minister of State
We understand that we may have to wait for an embassy, as we have the same delay on our end, but nevertheless we accept an embassy exchange. In the meantime, our ambassador Alex Dunn is among the officials who look forward to friendly drinking competitions, as competitive drinking is our national sport and a favorite activity for all Aurendians. |
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From the desk of Robber Captain Ug-Mt
Kalle Monoa, President of the Republic Anya Symondsi, Minister of State Martin Waneiwa, Minister of the Environment,
Dear respected leaders,
We are sorry to hear about the inability to transport the fruits to Az-cz for growth. Perhaps it would be possible to establish a greenhouse specifically for the growing of said fruit. Regardless we definitely plan on importing as much of these heavenly fruits as we can.
We have space for your embassy arranged and our looking forward to the arrival of ambassador Vanderhall. In return we will be sending An-Wn as ambassador to Aurendia. Please let us know when you are ready for her arrival.
With respects,
Ug-Mt |
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Az-cz |
Senator in Training |
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Posts: 246 |
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Dear Kalle Monoa, President of the Republic, Aurendia,
Thank you for the fruits and the alcoholic beverages. With this letter is attached some bottles of our finest liquors. I personally hope you're gonna love them.
I also hope you don't have any problem dealing with a woman. The only thing that will be different is the fact that one week per month, I want to go to war against everyone in Atlantian Oceania. That's a joke actually, don't believe that.
On another stance, I must tell you that I'm not really internationalist, but my cabinet is internationalist, so I'm accepting your invitation. But don't take that as a "I accept this because I'm forced to". So, I'm accepting to exchange embassies with pleasure.
Sincerely, Johanne Durocher, President of Oliverry |
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To: Anya Symondsi, Minister of State From: Richard Menszae, Minister of Foreign Affairs & Trade Subject: Re:Embassy Exchange
We will be happy to oblige such requirements. The embassy building is currently being re-designed to incorporate natural heating and cooling in many areas, such as incorporating large thermal mass, orientation to the sun and many other areas in accordance to such building regulations in the nation of Aurendia. Along with the residential complex.
We want to ensure that we are as good as hosts as we can be. We will keep you updated on the progress of construction, Mr Heath is currently on his way on a Bazalonian Diplomatic plane to present his diplomatic credentials. |
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Bazalonia |
Eating A Bazalope Burger |
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Posts: 774 |
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"A war once a month, huh. Haven’t heard that old chestnut in a while.” thought the Minister of State, reading the letter from Oliverry,.
When she had finished reading, she set out writing a response to President Durocher, as well as adding to the Environmental Ministry's reponse to Az-Cz.
QUOTE | To: Johanne Durocher, President of Oliverry
Bonjour Mademoiselle Durocher,
Thank you for your response, free liquor is always delicious liquor. I have to assume that “Kalle” and “Anya” must be uncommon names in Oliverry if you think we would have a problem dealing with female heads of state. More importantly, since the beginnings of human settlement in Aurendia, our society has viewed the sexes as equal, so of course a person’s gender has no bearing on any Aurendian’s view of that person.
Our decision to open relations has also met its fair share of domestic opposition. All the same, any democratic government must reflect the wishes of the electorate if they wish to keep governing. I hope that you will come to accept that more positives come from open relations than negatives. We will accept an embassy exchange, and Robert Newell has already been selected as our ambassador to Oliverry.
Bonne chance, Anya Symondsi, Minister of State |
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QUOTE | Robber Captain Ug-Mt,
Ambassador An-Wn may arrive as soon as you wish, as the Az-Cz embassy is essentially completed at this point with just minor exterior work being all that remains to be done.
Greenhouses may be an acceptable way to grow highland zillifruit, so long as conditions equal the fruit’s cloud-forest habitat: high concentrations of mycorrhizal soil fungi, between 3500-6000 feet in elevation, constant mist, and 12 hours of sunlight daily. Regardless, local growers are overjoyed at the prospect of exporting to Az-Cz.
Signed, Anya Symondsi, Minister of State Martin Waneiwa, Minister of the Environment
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